Skinner! I have seven other principals, and I've never yelled their names. Not even once.

Chalmers: I hate waiting. That's why I hate risotto.
Skinner: Even mushroom risotto?
Chalmers: What do you think?!?

I oversee fourteen schools and I always find myself at yours discussing a Simpson kid.

Chalmers: I recall you took a sick day of which you had none.
Skinner: I was gonna lose my foot...
Chalmers: Of which you have two.

Superintendent Chalmers: Willie, you're the new principal.
Willie: Who's the new groundskeeper?
Superintendent Chalmers: Also you. And you don't get more money.

Skinner, you're a regular Casanova, or, in English, regular house.

I'm dating one of your mothers. I forget which one.

Skinner: Simpson, I know you're behind this! Well, you are going to get some counseling from the school psychologist!
School Psychologist: DARK STANLEY'S GONNA EAT MY BRAINS!
Superintendent Chalmers: Or from a qualified professional.

(about the Springfield Creative Arts School)The whole school is made up of modeling clay! Every afternoon, they re-shape it just to get my goat!

Superintendent Chalmers: We're gonna put Bart Simpson away for a long, long time.
Principal Skinner: By law, the most we can give him is a 10-day suspension.
Superintendent Chalmers: That's long to a kid.

(After the Diet Coke and Mentos explosion.)
Superintendent Chalmers: Skinner! (Pause) Skinner?
Principal Skinner: I'm alright, sir.
Superintendent Chalmers: Don't ever scare me like that again.

Superintendent Chalmers: I'm a bit of a crossword head myself. They help me relax after a day of having to deal with... Skinner!
Principal Skinner: You called?
Superintendent Chalmers: Made reference.
Principal Skinner: My mistake.

The Simpsons Quotes

Lincoln, Lincoln. I've been thinkin'. What the hell have you've been drinkin'? Is it water? Is it wine? Oh, my gosh. It's turpentine!

Bart & Lisa

Officer Eddie: (reading Steve Sax's license) Well well, Steve Sax, from New York City.
Officer Lou: I heard some guy got killed in New York City and they never solved the case. But you wouldn't know anything about that now, would you, Steve?
(Lou and Eddie laugh)
Steve Sax: But there are hundreds of unsolved murders in New York City.
Officer Lou: You don't know when to keep your mouth shut, do you, Saxxy Boy?