Favorite The Devil Quotes
Sam: Well, if you hate him so much, why don't you just take care of him yourself?
Devil: That's not my job. Me, devil. You, minion
Devil: Yeah, it took a lot of elbow grease, a lot of limbs rent from a lot of torsos. But everybody started singling like canaries. Now Hell is sealed tight as a drum. And now, if I'm not mistaken, there's a demon about pitchfork deep in Mike's ass as we speak.
Sam: Mike was just in my elevator.
Devil: Not now, Winston, not now. I'm not gonna to lie to you, Sammy. I have some serious egg on my face. You know, I'm starting to feel that maybe torture isn't the way to get what you want, you know, like maybe people just tell you what you want to hear so that you stop pulling out their fingernails
That cage will never work on me. It might hold a demon, but come on... I'm the man!
Sam: Are you saying they're lying?
Devil: Listen, Sammy, they're your parents and you love them. But people who make deals with me generally aren't big on integrity. You can't get blood from a stone, I'm just saying
Sam: She read Tarot cards?
Devil: Yeah, she was the real deal. Sold her soul to me for the power to predict the future. Earned quite a reputation for herself until the local villagers hung her from a tree for consorting with the Devil. Surprisingly perceptive for a bunch of clods with pitchforks
Devil: Oh look, Sammy, I have too much respect to lie to you, so I tell you in advance that I am most probably going to lie to you. I'm the Devil, Sam, lying is kind of like my whole bag.
Sam: Yeah, well I figured as much.
Devil: Smart boy
I'm gonna be honest, your trip sounds like a real snore fest, did you at least get a hooker in Reno?
Sam: Did it work?
Devil: No, i just wanted to tell you your pentagram is a Star of David. Mazel Tov!
Well, I'll try to watch your back, buddy. But you know, you got to remember I'm a busy guy. It's an election year
Devil [to Sam]
Sam: You are a terrible person, seriously.
Devil: That's my job, man. You know, tempting the weak. Culling the herd. you know the drill
Sammy, punishing souls is like raising children. They need consistency. And you can't reward bad behavior. They step out of line, you just have to give them a timeout in the Closet of Abysmal Agony
Am I detecting a little sibling rivalry here? Don't worry, Sammy, there's no real competition. I'm always going to like him a little better than I like you
