Do we want [Abed] to freak out and have to rescue him from some fantasy world where submarines are small enough to enter the bloodstream?

Annie: I lost Abed!
Troy: I told you to never let him out of your sight! That goes double for holidays and wax museums!

Abed: Which wire do I cut?
Troy: There's only one.
Abed: God, I hope I'm right.

Chang you're insane. You're still into keytar?

Troy: Don't be alarmed if things get a little noisy.
Abed: Like my wife's mouth.

Murray: Wherever there is air, we have eyes.
Troy: Gross.

Abed: She can make babies for me.
Troy: Oh and I can't?

I made a new rule that the air conditioning school has to act like a real school. I can do that because I'm their Messiah.

Since we got expelled, he's been creepy weird like present day Robin Williams.

Troy [about Abed]

Hello rich people? Troy's joining you, yes I'll hold.

I was gonna be the first person in my family to graduate from community college. Everyone else graduated from normal college.

If we rub that, will he come out and do celebrity impressions?

Community Quotes

Me and Abed have an agreement. If one of us dies, we stage it to look like a suicide caused by the unjust cancellation of Firefly. We're gonna get that show back on the air buddy!

Troy

Annie: When you found out I was Jewish, you invited me to a 'pool party' that turned out to be a Baptism.
Shirley: Well excuse me for trying to sneak you into Heaven.