(In Mr. Burns' office, the Government Inspector gives Mr. Burns his report.)
Government Inspector: Mr. Burns, in 20 years, I have never seen such a shoddy, deplorable--
Mr. Burns: Oh look! Some careless person has left thousands and thousands of dollars just lying here on my coffee table. Uh, Smithers, why don't we leave the room, and hopefully, when we return, the pile of money will be gone.
(Mr. Burns and Smithers exit for a moment and then return to the office.)
Mr. Burns: Doh! Look, Smithers, the money and a very stupid man are still here.


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Mr. Burns Quotes, The Simpsons Season 2 Episode 4 Quotes, The Simpsons Quotes
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The Simpsons Season 2 Episode 4 Quotes

(After dinner at the Simpsons goes badly and costs Mr.Burns the election, he and Smithers head home.)
Mr. Burns: Ironic, isn't it, Smithers? This anonymous clan of slack-jawed troglodytes has cost me the election. And yet, if I were to have them killed, I would be the one to go to jail. That's democracy for you.
Smithers: You are noble and poetic in defeat, sir.

(about Blinky) Oh, Marge, what's the big deal? I bet before the papers blew this out of proportion, you didn't even know how many eyes a fish had.

Homer