Something something danger zone. I know. I'm not even trying anymore.

Lana: You're looking for Predator aren't you? A, he's invisible.
Archer: Not totally, he has a tall tell shimmer.

If I stop drinking all at once, I'm afraid the cumulative hangover will kill me.

Sterling: I have an El Camino.
Ron: Oh so you're all set. That will hold way more hispanics and lawn mowers.

Seriously, what is this, the Shire?

Lana

You can lie, but your boner can't.

Cheryl: Think about someone else for once in your life.
Lana: And that's her saying that.

That's racist. Jingoist. Whatever.

Eat a dick, jungle.

Don't yell at me, I'm not the one advocating rape and child cannibalism.

Sterling: If you don't want to see two robots smashing each other with cop cars and shit as they fight each other through the streets of Manhattan...
Krieger: Stop. My penis can only get so erect.

Rip: Those could be pirates.
Sterling: Okay, well then they'll do just have to do until we find some cowboys and indians.

Archer Quotes

Cheryl: What the stupid shit are you doing??
Cyril: You said you wanted watermelon.
Cheryl: Watermelon's red?
Cyril: Yes. How do you not know that?
Cheryl: Who am I? Charles Frederick Andress?

Cyril: Why are you so scared of crocodiles?
Archer: Gee, I don't know, Cyril. Maybe deep down I'm afraid of any apex predator that lived through the K-T extinction. Physically unchanged for a hundred million years, because it's the perfect killing machine. A half ton of cold-blooded fury, the bite force of 20,000 Newtons, and stomach acid so strong it can dissolve bones and hoofs.