Popular Archer Quotes
Archer: I forgot you won the Olympic gold medal in men's downhill.
Gillette: Well, ass, it was giant shalom and I only took bronze.
Archer: So? You lost?
Gillette: I came in third.
Archer: Which is last.
Gillette: Which is third...
Gillette: In he world.
Archer: You lost. Geeze, get over it.
Something something danger zone. I know. I'm not even trying anymore.
Bloody mary, blessed are you among cocktails. Pray for me now in the hour of my death, which I hope is soon. Amen.
I'm sorry, Lana. I said a woman. Not a stevedore who lost his hand in a stevedoring accident and then got a hand transplant from an actual bear!
I'm sorry I can't hear you over the sound of my giant throbbing erection.
Cyril: Why do we always have to share a room?
Ray: The sinister gay cabal, Cyril. You have fallen victim to the sinister gay cabal.
I swear to god you could drown a toddler in my panties right now.Pam
Cherlene: Who the hell drilled my box?
Archer: So we're just done with phrasing, right, that's not a thing anymore?
Cheryl: Beep beep beep.
Pam: Oh, your giving me the truck noise, Karen Carpenter stunt double?
Cheryl: I'm sorry, I thought you were walking backwards.
Cheryl: It's Carol.
Archer: What? Since when?
Cheryl: Since I had it legally changed because you always call me Carol.
Archer: Wow, that's... excuse us.
Oh please, Pam's as full of crap as she is of carbohydrates.Malory
Cyril: Besides, I'm sure it's not the first time you've kept a secret from Lana.
Archer: Uh, hello. Herpes.
Cyril: You gave Lana herpes?!