Archer
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on FXArcher Season 2 Quotes
Archer: This must be what it's like to have sex with me.
Lana: How could an airboat be selfish?
Archer [to airboat owner]: I've waited my entire life to say this exact phrase, "I'm commandeering this airboat!"
Lana: Sorry, it really is an emergency.
Archer: Of an awesome and ass-kicking nature!
Lana: He's attacked nuclear power plants, hydroelectric dams, and whaling ships.
Archer: Whaling ships? What he's got something against clean burning lamp oil?
His name's Gandalf and he's not a hippie?
Flight Attendant: Sir, can you please find your seat?
Archer: Uh yeah, it's right there. Can you go find some more hurricanes for me?
Lana: Is that a friggin' candy bar?
Archer: Yeah, but do you think you need the calories?
Malory: Why are you drinking?
Archer: It's a party.
Malory: It's a baby shower! For the bastard child you pumped into a filthy whore!
Archer: I'm obviously not saying now, but one of these days you're make the best grandmother ever.
Krieger: So, uh have you ever thought about having a baby?
Cheryl: Sometimes I think about adopting a little baby so I could abandon it at a mall.
Krieger: That answers my follow up question.
The mochachino ones are the cutest. And I guess he'd be half gay too. Can you say, "best dancer ever!?"
Pam
Lana: Did you see me holding that baby?
Gillette: Look liked Tyson holding that dove.
Give her the rabbit, Lenny!
Gillette
That's disgusting. If I wanted to look at your bare feet, Woodhouse, I'd sneak in and do it while you're asleep.
