Brooklyn Nine-Nine
Thursdays 8:00 PM on NBCBrooklyn Nine-Nine Season 1 Quotes
My mother cried when I was born because she knew that she'd never be better than me.
Gina
The crap library. All of the magazines are in the bathroom.
Jake
Wait a minute - you're Hitchcocking me?
Jake
I am flummoxed! That's a word I learned for this party, and I am it!
Jake
Terry: I specifically said "no shorts."
Scully: Sarge, it's not my fault. You said so many things about shorts, I got confused
Here are the rules. No staring at your phone, no rolling in two hours late, no sweatpants, no jeans, no shorts.
Terry
I'm fine at parties. I just stand in the middle of the room and don't say anything.
Rosa
Oh man! All the orange soda spilled out of my cereal.
Jake
There's very little street parking, no gifts, no singing of Happy Birthday. Should be fun.
Holt
It's probably just an empty white cube with a USB port for him to plug his finger in when he's on sleep mode.
Jake
Who's Kevin Cozner? Is he the star of "Danzzes with Wolvezz?"
Jake
Amy: The greatest thing that could ever happen has just happened.
Jake: The girl who beat you for high school valedictorian died?