Californication

Californication

Sundays 10:30 PM on Showtime

Latest Review

Season: 6 5 4 3

Californication Quotes (Page 2)

Season 6 Episode 4: "Hell Bent for Leather"

Hank: I still think you are mean, petty and vindictive, but I'm thinking maybe we should hate f-ck? Get the poison out?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Marcy: I am the sh-t when it comes to making p-ssies pretty.
 • Rating: Unrated
Charlie: Why you wanna rain on my gay parade?
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 6 Episode 3: "Dead Rock Stars"

Hank: Why would I put some clothes on? This is the way baby Jesus made me.
 • Rating: Unrated
Atticus: Hank Moody get up off your ass and come with me. I'm going to play you the greatest song ever written in the history of the universe. After which we shall snort cocaine and have our ass-oles tongued by the angels.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Faith: Seems like the kind of night where you need to feel everything. Even if it hurts so bad you want to tear your fu-king skin off.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Ken: The client insists Charlie! Now go get you di-k sucked by a stranger!
 • Rating: Unrated
Krull: Without her there'd be no rock and roll.
 • Rating: Unrated
Hank: I support you bromo-sexual.
 • Rating: Unrated
Charlie: I'm in a pickle Hank! It's a big gay pickle!
 • Rating: Unrated
Hank: Can I bring anything back for you damaged fu-kers? Some coke? Some heroine? Some Pink Taco?
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 6 Episode 2: "Quitters"

Faith: What's so bad about taking a vacation from your life?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Marcy: We fool ourselves into thinking we can make them into these sensitive little p-ssy eaters we can sit and watch The Bachelor with.
 • Rating: Unrated
Hank: I guess I see myself as an enthusiast. A drug and alcohol enthusiast.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Hank: I feel like the good lord himself picked me up with his bare hands, laid me down on a bed of rusty nails, pinned my ankles behind my ears and just stuck it in. No Vaseline no lube no nothin. Not even a little spittle. That mother fu-ker just took his Darth Vader helmet, that big Darth Vader helmet and just rammed it home. He wrecked my pretty little virgin a--hole, my sweet little brown bud. Pulled out, came on my t-ts, wiped his di-k on the curtains and left me for dead. That's just me. How bout you guys?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Hank: I know I'm a big fan of the bye bye pain juice, but I don't think I'm an alcoholic do you?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Charlie: Now there is the surly mean spirited bastard I know and love. He's back!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 6 Episode 1: "The Unforgiven"

Hank: Worst intervention ever.
 • Rating: Unrated
Charlie: Some crazy bitch tries to kill you, you defend her honor. Your best friend tries to help you, you punch him in the face?
 • Rating: Unrated
Hank: I like my stink.
 • Rating: Unrated

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Season: 6 5 4 3
Total Season 6 Quotes: 40
Total Californication Quotes: 319
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