Community

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Community
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I may not be good with facial expressions, but I know an evil doppelganger when I see one. Plus, your arm makes a noise every time you move it.

Abed

Jeff! It's bad luck to see the graduation before the graduation!

Annie

Britta: When's the graduation ceremony?
Jeff: Never. It's community college. You send in some papers and they stop charging you.

Well, it's official--it's on a banner.

Jeff

Annie, why are you acting like a mistress in a Lifetime movie?

Jeff

I've spent almost four years here, growing and changing and making dioramas.

Jeff

I thought pushing that woman's head through a jukebox would make me feel better, but I'm just out $54...and a marriage.

Shirley

I know you're all wondering how I do it. How do I balance straight A's, extracurriculars, and Israeli folk dancing every Friday night?

Annie

Abed, we don't have origin stories, we have lives. At least...yup, just me.

Jeff

Britta, we're done. I ate a hamburger the other day and suddenly I'm not cold all the time.

Protester

We're really filling in some plot holes here.

Abed

I call it "the Crazy Quilt of Destiny," mostly because "the Loom of Fate" was already taken.

Abed
Displaying quotes 85 - 96 of 873 in total

Community Quotes

I'm no sociopath, I always know what I'm doing is wrong. I'm just a guy that doesn't like taking tests, doing work, and getting yelled at. So if you think about it, I'm the sanest person here.

Jeff

Hello during a random dessert, the month and day of which coincide numerically with your expulsion from a uterus.

Troy [reading the cake]