Did you finally get a visit from the nutsack fairy?

Ellie

• Permalink: Did you finally get a visit from the nutsack fairy?
• Added: January 29, 2013

I got hired on Cougar Town and they only let me write these. My name's Donny. Hi, Mom.

Title Card

• Permalink: I got hired on Cougar Town and they only let me write these. My ...
• Added: January 22, 2013

I'm sure the jury will understand when Travis is explaining why he broke into the morgue to spoon your corpse.

Ellie

• Permalink: I'm sure the jury will understand when Travis is explaining why ...
• Added: January 22, 2013

They're like fire hydrants, but useful.

Jules

• Permalink: They're like fire hydrants, but useful.
• Added: January 22, 2013

Jules: This sucks I need Grayson to care about what's going on in our lives. All I ever wanted was to grow old with someone and argue with them while we drink wine.
Ellie: That sounds like us. What do you say we pack it all in and become big ol' dykes?
Jules: No, not yet, but I'd like to know that choice is out there. Stay skinny just in case.
Ellie: Deal.

• Permalink: This sucks I need Grayson to care about what's going on in our l...
• Added: January 22, 2013

Don't look a gift whore in the mouth.

Laurie

• Permalink: Don't look a gift whore in the mouth.
• Added: January 22, 2013

Ellie this isn't fun anymore turn it off.

Jules

• Permalink: Ellie this isn't fun anymore turn it off.
• Added: January 22, 2013

Jules: Who pretend throws things to show their anger?!
Grayson: Lots of people.

• Permalink: Who pretend throws things to show their anger?! Lots of people...
• Added: January 22, 2013

Bobby's AA Sponsor: You're drinking?
Bobby: Well it is four.

• Permalink: You're drinking? Well it is four.
• Added: January 22, 2013

Okay, others may see you as a terrifying hate goblin, but they don't matter I see my fiery hell raiser beautiful wife who loves me more than anything.

Andy

• Permalink: Okay, others may see you as a terrifying hate goblin, but they d...
• Added: January 16, 2013

Laurie: Zooey Descha-hell-no, what you two need is revenge. If someone hurts you, you hurt them right back.
Jules: Yeah revenge is better I'm in.
Andy: Me too.

• Permalink: Zooey Descha-hell-no, what you two need is revenge. If someone h...
• Added: January 16, 2013

Grayson: Cheer up, Trav will eventually come by, you raised him to be dependent and helpless.
Jules: Thanks Babe.
Grayson: I knew you'd take that as a compliment.

• Permalink: Cheer up, Trav will eventually come by, you raised him to be dep...
• Added: January 16, 2013