The truth is rarely pure and never simple - Oscar Wilde

Reid

Reid: This is really good coffee, by the way. Coffee's a language in itself.
Loker: Who said that -- Dickens?
Reid: Jackie Chan

Rossi: What if this is like the Manchurian Candidate?
Hotch: A domineering mother molds her candidate son into an unwitting assassin.

Reid [in Russian]: Would you like to have coffee sometime?
Loker: I was hoping you'd ask.

Troy: What you did to Sophie was unforgiveable.
Dinah: I'm sorry Benjie.
Troy: But it worked. Now what do I do?

Kate: I think she's just rebelling against a conversation we had the other night. It doesn't take a profiler to figure out why Meg would decide to pierce her belly-button.
Morgan: No.
Kate: Yes.
Morgan: Seriously. Okay so that's why you've got this little glow thing going on.
Kate: Well, you know.
Morgan: And all this time I thought it was just me making you blush.
Kate: Oh it's that too.
Morgan: Congrats. Come here.

Garcia: You guys. Kate has the best news! Say it before you have to do the other stuff.
Kate: Good morning, I'm pregnant.

There is hardly anyone whose sexual life, if it were broadcast, would not fill the world at large with surprise and horror - W. Somerset Maughan

Rossi

Reid: How long was it from the start of the bruising until the kill?
Medical Examiner: Roughly six hours.
Rossi: Nobody has sex for six straight hours, not even Sting.

JJ: Dating sites like Ashley-Madison suggests married people are more likely to cheat with other married people.
Rossi: Mutually assured destruction.

I'm all yours, give it to me. Wait. Sir. I meant that in the "how can I help you" way, not the----cause you're super lovely and I'm on speaker, aren't I?

Garcia

Garcia: It is way more popular than I thought.
JJ: How popular?
Garcia: Like cultural phenomenon. Like licensed products. Like red silk scarves and lingerie and....oh my personal favorite is a baby onesie that says "9 months ago my mom read Bare Reflections". Which is super creepy and weirdly cute.

Criminal Minds Quotes

As life runs on, the road grows strange with faces new. And near the end, the milestones into headstones change, 'neath every one a friend - James Russell Lowell

Rossi

Hotch: A sniper can wait up to 72 hours without sleeping.
Mays: Seriously?
Rossi: That's part of their training. They can stay awake for 72 hours and remain completely focused on their target.
Mays: How?
Hotch: By using a mental exercise called "fantasy integration". A sniper creates a scenarios involving a target that keeps that person at the forefront of their mind.
Morgan: Often they'll imagine a place where they're with the target, doing something together that takes time. For example, building a car.
JJ: For some, the fantasy begins the minute they're assigned a target. Then nothing will distract them.