Let's go find a big, black, sassy, nurse. There's always one

Stewie

• Permalink: Let's go find a big, black, sassy, nurse. There's always one
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

You call those cheap implants boobs?! Those aren't boobs! They're lies!

Stewie

• Permalink: You call those cheap implants boobs?! Those aren't boobs! They'r...
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Peter: (very drunk) Did I miss Byron's reward?
Lois: "Brian's award". And yes, you did!
Peter: Brian, you've been a good son, and I'm sorry you're so sick.

• Permalink: Did I miss Byron's reward? Brian's award. And yes, you did! ...
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Sorry I was out of it. I'm sorry are we being robbed?

Stewie

• Permalink: Sorry I was out of it. I'm sorry are we being robbed?
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Mr. and Mrs. Griffin, I'm afraid your coma's in a daughter. (laughs) I mean, I mean your daughter's in a coma. What? Oh my God, did you hear what I said? (waggles tounge) Brain freeze! Oh my god. Oh, that one is going in the Christmas letter.

Dr. Hartman

• Permalink: Mr. and Mrs. Griffin, I'm afraid your coma's in a daughter. I m...
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Good luck. I hope you like weird boobs.

Carter Pewterschmidt

• Permalink: Good luck. I hope you like weird boobs.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Okay, first of all, Bonnie, you've been pregnant for like six years, all right. Either have the baby or don't

Peter

• Permalink: Okay, first of all, Bonnie, you've been pregnant for like six ye...
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Hey Chris? What ever happened to Geena Davis? She used to be in movies but she's not in movies anymore. She's attractive enough but when she smiles you see too much gum. Not enough tooth to gum ratio. Chris? Ah I'll tell you tomorrow!

Stewie

• Permalink: Hey Chris? What ever happened to Geena Davis? She used to be in ...
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Carl: So in the bear world, are pandas like your version of interracial children?
Bear: Yeah Pandas are something I don't agree with.
Carl: They're cute though right?
Bear: Just when they're babies.

• Permalink: So in the bear world, are pandas like your version of interracia...
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Math, my dear boy, is nothing more than the lesbian sister of biology

Peter

• Permalink: Math, my dear boy, is nothing more than the lesbian sister of bi...
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Chris: Brian's the new Meg! Brian's the new Meg!
Meg: Yeah, you're the new me!
Peter: Shut up, Meg.

• Permalink: Brian's the new Meg! Brian's the new Meg! Yeah, you're the new...
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

BILF! Total BILF! Yeah, it's going
totally good... I got about six pacifiers now.

• Permalink: BILF! Total BILF! Yeah, it's going totally good... I got about...
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0