Carol: Uh, I don't think she's in the bathroom. Her coat is gone.
Ross: Well maybe it's cold in there. Or maybe I screwed up the first date I had in nine years.

Monica: Look, here's a picture of Scotty Jared naked.
Rachel: Hey he's wearing a sweater.
Monica: No.

Phoebe: Okay, so now we need, um, sage branches and the sacramental wine.
Monica: All I have is, is oregano and a Fresca.

Chandler: Oh, what a crappy night!
Janice: Although, I have enjoyed the fact that, uh your shirt's been sticking out of your zipper ever since you came back from the bathroom.

Phoebe: Okay. We can, um, we can burn the stuff they gave us.
Rachel: Or?
Phoebe: Or... or we can chant and dance around naked, you know, with sticks.
Monica: Burning's good.

Phoebe: Oh! You know my friend Abby who shaves her head? She said that if you want to break the bad boyfriend cycle, you can do like a cleansing ritual.
Rachel: Pheebs, this woman is voluntarily bald.

Joey: No, no, no, don't! I've been waiting for, like, forever to go out with Lorraine. Just calm down.
Chandler: Calm down? Calm down? You set me up with the woman that I've dumped twice in the last five months!

(To Joey) Okay, now, remember, no trading. You get the pretty one, I get the mess.

Chandler

Kristin: (About Carol and Susan) Who are they?
Ross: The blond woman is my ex-wife, and the woman touching her is her... close, personal friend.
Kristin: You mean they're lovers.
Ross: If you wanna put a label on it.

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