Friends

Friends Season 1 Quotes

Season 1 Episode 24: "The One Where Rachel Finds Out"

Joey: It's like I'm able to appreciate it on another level!
Chandler: I didn't know you had another level.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ross: I'm going to China.
Joey: The country?
Ross: No, the big pile of dishes in my mom's breakroom.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Melanie: (Talking about Joey) There is a little child inside this man.
Chandler: Yes, the doctor said if they remove it, he'll die.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Joey: (About participating in a fertility study) Alright, come on you guys, it's not that big a deal. Really... I mean, I just go down there every other day and... make my contribution to the project. Hey, hey, but at the end of two weeks, I get seven hundred dollars.
Ross: Hey.
Phoebe: Wow, you're gonna be making money hand over fist.
 • Rating: Unrated

Monica: (About Ross's gift) I can't believe he did this.
Chandler: Come on, Ross? Remember back in college, when he fell in love with Carol and bought her that ridiculously expensive crystal duck?
Rachel: What did you just say?
Chandler: (Panicked) Ahem... um... Crystal duck.
Rachel: No, no, no... the, um, the... "love" part?
Chandler: (Stuttering incoherently) F-hah... flennin...
Rachel: Oh... my God.
Chandler: (Rubbing his temples) Oh, no-no-no-no-no...
Joey: That's good, just keep rubbing your head. That'll turn back time.
 • Rating: Unrated

Phoebe: (About Ross bringing luggage) How long did you think this barbecue was gonna last?
Ross: I'm going to China.
Phoebe: Jeez, you say one thing, and...
Monica: You're going to China?
Ross: (Not wanting to get into it) It's for the museum. Someone found a bone. We want the bone. They don't want us to have the bone. I'm going to try to persuade them to give us the bone. It's a whole big bone thing.
 • Rating: Unrated

Joey: If I wanna get the money, I'm not allowed to conduct any personal experiments, if you know what I mean.
Monica: Joey, we always know what you mean.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Chandler: Rachel! I love you! Deal with me first!
 • Rating: Unrated

Monica: (To Rachel) Then why the hell are you dumping my brother?
 • Rating: Unrated

Chandler: Men are here!
Joey: We make fire! Cook meat!
Chandler: Then put out fire by peeing, no get invited back!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Joey: Man, oh, man. It was like a ticker-tape parade.
Chandler: I know. As it happens, my room is extremely close to the parade route.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ross: Hey, is Rachel here? Um, I wanted to wish her a happy birthday before I left
Monica: Oh, no, she's out having drinks with Carl
Ross: Oh. Hey, who's Carl?
Monica: You know, that guy she met at the coffeehouse.
Ross: No.
Phoebe: Oh, well, see, there's this guy she met at the...
Ross: At the coffeehouse, right.
Phoebe: So you do know who he is!
 • Rating: Unrated

Joey: (To Ross) We want you to be happy. And I may only have a couple beers in me, but... I love you, man.
Chandler: I'm still on my first. I... I just think you're nice.
 • Rating: Unrated

Joey: Move on. Go to China. Eat Chinese food.
Chandler: Of course there, they just call it food.
 • Rating: Unrated

Joey: What? You think I'm gonna tell a girl I like that, I'm also seeing a cup?
 • Rating: Unrated

Ross: (Looking at baby pictures) And here's little Ben nodding off...
Monica: Aw, look at Aunt Monica's little boy!
Phoebe: Oh, look, he's got Ross's haircut!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Joey: Hey, Chan, can you help me out here? I promise I'll pay you back.
Chandler: Oh, yeah, right, Okay... including the waffles last week, you now owe me... 17 jillion dollars.
 • Rating: Unrated

Joey: Well, I'm helping out down at the NYU Med School with some... research.
Ross: What kind of research?
Joey: Oh, just, ya know... science.
Ross: Science. Yeah, I think I've heard of that.
Joey: (Sighing) It's a fertility study.
Monica: Oh, Joey, please tell me you're only donating your time.
 • Rating: Unrated

Phoebe: (About Rachel finding out that Ross loves her) This is really, really huge.
Chandler: No it's not. It's small. It's tiny. It's petite. It's wee.
Phoebe: Nuh-uh. I don't think any of our lives are ever gonna be the same ever again.
Chandler: Okay, is there a mute button on this woman?
 • Rating: Unrated

Chandler: (About Ross) He's in China!
Joey: The country.
Monica: No, no, wait. (Checking Ross's itinerary) His flight doesn't leave for another forty five more minutes.
Chandler: What about the time difference?
Monica: From here to the airport?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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