Season 1, Episode 20: "Gary Fixes Allison's Garbage Disposal"
Mitch: Allison just gave you her most precious giftGary: Her gift was a lot more precious two kids ago
Allison: Yeah? You still unwrapped it like a drunk monkey
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Gary: There goes another satistifed customer from gary's house of love. over five served
Mitch: You got nothing
Gary: I got nothing. How did you know?
Mitch: I'm a marine. I can hear enemy scouts sneaking into a foxhole from two hundred yards away. Last night? I didn't hear that
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Season 1, Episode 19: "Gary and His Half Brother"
Gary [to Tom about his report]: I don't want you fooling with the margins this time around, your last report looked like a grocery list• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Jack: Why can't I remember anything?
Gary: Lots of reasons dad. Ounces and ounces of reasons
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Season 1, Episode 18: "Gary and the Trophy"
Gary: What do you say, Kim? Let's get out there and settle this with our balls• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Dad: What about Allison?
Gary: Dad, the only time I ever want to hear that sentences is if we're on a life raft and someone has to go
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Ella: My people hate your people
Tom: You're talking about painters and floorers, not Koreans and whatever I am, right?
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Tom: What are you reading?
Ella: Pre-calc
Tom: I read the sequel, calculus
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Season 1, Episode 17: "Gary Hooks Up Allison"
Lindsay: Why are you whispering?Gary: I'm at the opera
Lindsay: Are you painting it?
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Dennis: Why don't you go over to Ms. Plummer's?
Gary: I can't, she has cats
Dennis: What's wrong with cats?
Gary: I can't get naked in front of cats, they bat at things that dangle
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Total Quotes: 42
















