Favorite House Quotes
Foreman: You're gonna sleep with another woman tonight, and then go home to your wife:
House: Thank God someone's keeping an eye on what's important.
A friend can't buy an overpriced Italian Espresso machine for another friend without a motive?
You seriously think it would kill her if we spent 15 seconds mocking you?
Dr. Wilson: Just think of this as a dream.
Sam: What about House?
Dr. Wilson: I said a dream, not a nightmare.
House: I woke up in the wrong bed this morning.
Nurse Jeffrey: Any bed you're in is the wrong one.
House: That's not what your mama said. Oh! Snap.
Nurse Jeffrey: I'll be going now. To Human Resources.
Dr. Chase: Oh, drinks are on me and Foreman tonight.
House: Can't. Pap smear.
I'm not stressed... beyond the stress induced by you telling me how stressed I am.
House: Aren't therapists supposed to be nurturing?
Nolan: Nowhere is that in the manual.
And a minute ago, he was skulking around in the background like some sort of manipulative Iago.
Nolan
Hanna: Would you pray with me?
House: No. I'm not n the habit of encouraging my patients' superstitions.
Hanna: How is that a habit? You plan on getting trapped under a building again?
House: I don't believe in God.
Hanna: I don't either.
Hanna: You think we could be friends when I get outta here?
House: Sure. We'll catch a ball game or... group sex show or something.
What are you clinging to, House? You're gonna risk her life just to save her leg? Really worked out well for you, didn't it? What do you have in your life, honestly? Tell me. I'm moving on. Wilson is moving on. And you... you've got nothing, House. Nothing.
Dr. Cuddy
