How can you believe in dark matter, but not in dark spirits?


Chase: I'm looking at her.
Park: Um, I'm looking at him.
House: Good. Now lick your lips.

My watch must have stopped. Must be a quarter to never.


I'll tell you what would be weirder. If you didn't have a sex dream about Chase.


Relax. I'm a doctor. Your spectacular breasts mean nothing to me.

For a moment I thought you were uncomfortable with Chase because you had a nocturnal Australian.

Wilson: You are a horrible person.
House: All I need is to break up one marriage. You broke up three of your own. You're like the Stephen Hawking of killing relationships.

Ohhhh. A metaphor. What you didn't foresee is that I actually do have a sex doll.


Adams: You can juggle. I fail to see how this would benefit you.
House: What if I'm busy?

Thank you, Butterscotch. Is that a family name?

35 year old male who cries blood and is not Vampire Bill. Go!

Chase: I was doing something nice.
House:, that doesn't sound right.

House Quotes

Taub: You know he just doesn't want to live in pain.
House: Life is pain! I wake up every morning in pain! Work is pain! You know how many times I just wanted to give up? How many times I've thought about ending it?

People don't get what they deserve. They just get what they get. There's nothing any of us can do about it.