House

House Season 5 Quotes (Page 3)

Season 5 Episode 20: "Simple Explanation"

Dr. Cuddy: I'm sorry for your loss.
House: Thanks, but it isn't my loss.
Dr. Cuddy: Then I'm sorry you don't think it is.
 • Rating: Unrated

Dr. Cuddy: I'm sorry. I've hired a grief counselor, whom I'm sure none of you will see. And I'm offering time off, which I'm sure none of you will take, but just know it's available.
 • Rating: Unrated

Dr. Foreman: His parents were shot right in front of him.
House: Parents are ancient history.
Dr. Foreman: Not to someone who actually cares.
 • Rating: Unrated

Thirteen: She claims he got stronger as soon as she stopped breathing.
Taub: The mind can heal the body. Seeing his wife in distress might actually have slowed down his death.
House: Or he just had an adrenaline surge when he saw his chance to hit the singles' market.

 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 5 Episode 19: "Locked In"

Dr. Wilson: You're spying on your team.
House: Prioritize, Wilson! Is that what you really want to torture me about right now?
 • Rating: Unrated

Lee: How come I'm not better? God's not supposed to work in trial and error.
House: God's mistakes are well-documented. If he'd done everything right the first time, there'd have been one plague and zero great flood.
 • Rating: 1.0 / 5.0

Dr. Wilson: Your crash was ten miles from the Orange County Progressive Pain Clinic.
House: You live ten miles from Mary's Dress Shop. Yet that's not even on my list of reasons that I think you're secretly a transvestite.
 • Rating: Unrated

Dr. Cuddy: What were you doing up there, anyway?
House: Antiquing. I found you a late Victorian corset. Come by later, I'll tie you up.
 • Rating: Unrated

Lee: (thinking) I never thought I'd be praying for a brain tumor, but please, dear God.
House: If you're praying in there, stop it right now.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

House: She's the smart one. I just keep Dark and Darker to fill out the quota.
 • Rating: Unrated

House: That's my diagnostics posse. Hot, Dark, and Darker.
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Molly: I don't know how God is going to get us through this. But He will.
House: Stop it, I'm blushing.
 • Rating: Unrated

House: Hey, genius. I think it violates certain ethical laws to rip the organs out of a guy who's still alive. Certain law laws, too.
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 5 Episode 18: "Here Kitty"

Kutner: You really lost all that money?
Taub: I don't care about the money. I just feel bad for Rachel.
Kutner: She married a guy in one situation and ended up with another. That's hard on anyone.
Taub: Thanks. Makes me feel much better hearing my wife's a gold digger.
 • Rating: Unrated

Morgan: I don't smoke.
House: Fine. You don't want the seventh graders to think you're cool.
 • Rating: Unrated

House: The cat was not predicting deaths. It was just trying to keep warm.
Dr. Wilson: Yes, dead people are renowned for their warm glow.
 • Rating: Unrated

Morgan: I had colds all winter.
House: Well, I've been in this room a while, but it's spring now, right?
 • Rating: Unrated

Dr. Cuddy: I told you to get rid of "death cat."
House: Do you see a cat?
Dr. Cuddy: I see a litter box.
(House grabs his cane)
House: This is a disability, Dr. Cuddy. Can't make it to the men's room on time.
Dr. Cuddy: You pee on the mice too?
House: Well, now you see the mice actually prove that I don't have a cat.
Dr. Cuddy: Are these... are these the genetically modified lab mice from oncology?
House: Genetically modified for tastiness.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 5 Episode 17: "The Social Contract"

Dr. Wilson: I'm not always nice. I'm not nice to you.
House: Because you know nice bores me. Hence, still nice.
 • Rating: Unrated

Dr. Cuddy: How's the patient?
Nick: Whoa. I would do here in a minute with fudge and a cherry on top. Would someone please explain to this women? There's only so many apologies I can...
Thirteen: He has frontal lobe disinhibition.
Nick: I've already embarrassed myself with one doctor. Who, I am at this moment imagining with you, in a king-size bed with a mirror on the ceiling... I am so, so sorry. (to Cuddy) But if I couldn't have both of you together, you would definitely be my first choice.
Dr. Cuddy: Where's House?
Nick: Like trying not to think of an elephant. Not that you're an elephant. Your breasts in fact are all homo sapiens.
Dr. Foreman: House isn't here.
Dr. Cuddy: Oh, he wouldn't have paged me if he couldn't watch and enjoy this.
 • Rating: Unrated

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