How I Met Your Mother

How I Met Your Mother Quotes (Page 3)

Season 8 Episode 11: "The Final Page, Part One"

Barney: You un-jinxed me! I'm free! If the bison on the nickel could hear you talk about them they would diminish their population even further on purpose, if Lily wants a big weiner in her mouth she's got my number and I'm sorry that you took the rap for all the farting on the ride up here, that was me!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ted: This is gonna be a long jinx. Like Yom Kippur services long. The only difference is Yom Kippur's a fast and this one's gonna be a slow.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Barney: Marshall, I'm a grown ass man. I'm on my building's co-op board. When I say a pinot noir tastes luxuriously earthy with a hint of rhubarb? I'm not faking it.
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 8 Episode 10: "The Over-Correction"

Ted: Barney, or should I say Borrowney?
Marshall: You should never say that.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ted: Hugh Hefner, in you lobby, right now!
Barney: I'm gonna grab my robe!
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Robin: I love Patrice, we're like sisters.
Ted: You've never gotten through even one exchange without screaming at her.
Robin: Sisters fight Ted!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 8 Episode 9: "Lobster Crawl"

Ted: I'm sorry, when I'm excited I abbreviate words I shouldn't.
 • Rating: 2.0 / 5.0

Barney: Thanks Robin, this game affects my league score!
 • Rating: 2.5 / 5.0

Lily: Do it! If you ever wanna see these boobs again, crawl you sonnova me!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Barney: Why should bibs only be socially acceptable when you're eating lobster?
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

Season 8 Episode 8: "Twelve Horny Women"

Judge 1: Thank you Mr. Eriksen. The panel will take this under advisement.
Marshall: Take your time.
Judge 2: It could be a few months.
Marshall: Better tell my wife then I won't be home for dinner.
Judge 2: Get out!
 • Rating: Unrated

Barney: Go ahead laugh. Laugh like all the others, but those magicians pulled off the greatest trick of all. They accepted me.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Robin: There is a dark side to being a rocker on the road north of the 49th!
 • Rating: Unrated

Lily: I was like John Gotti in a training bra.
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 8 Episode 7: "The Stamp Tramp"

Barney: Barney Stinson has to do what's right for Barney Stinson's penis.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Barney: I have nothing but the utmost respect for you skanks.
 • Rating: Unrated

Robin: Bottom line Vito a lot of strip clubs are into my client. If you want The Melon Patch to be in the mix we're gonna need bigger melons and smaller patches. Otherwise your establishment is not where Barney Stinson is going to pitch his tent.
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 8 Episode 6: "Splitsville"

Ted: Things have been weird lately. Is there another architect? Just tell me.
 • Rating: Unrated

Barney: You were this close to ripping off his misbuttoned shirt and pulling down his inside out underpants.
 • Rating: Unrated

Marshall: Okay that's ridiculous! Is Nick a genius? No. But does he have average intelligence? No! But he is a human being with a heart!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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