How I Met Your Mother

How I Met Your Mother Season 6 Quotes (Page 12)

Season 6 Episode 2: "Cleaning House"

Barney: Look at us... it's like three of the same guy. Oh my god, this explains why I was always so good at basketball. Guys, I'm black, sorry African American, no I'm allowed to say both.
 • Rating: Unrated

Barney: Ah, Valentines, the second base of third grade.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Marshall: No Santa needs protein.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Lily: Then there's the most popular parental lie in history: Santa.
Marshall: But that's a good lie. Like when we tell Ted he'll meet the right girl and settle down.
 • Rating: Unrated

James: Flip Wilson, Bill Cosby, James Earl Jones, Meadowlark Lemon? The list goes on and on.
 • Rating: Unrated

Post Master General: Janie Masterson's mother is whore. With gin on her breath at ten in the morning, she's got some nerve kicking us out of the car pool.
 • Rating: Unrated

Robin: What, you know what you're doing down there.
Ted: Oh Teddy West Side can bring it, we know this.
 • Rating: Unrated

James: When is the last time you saw a diaper poking out of a Dolce and Gabbana suit?
Marshall: Tuesday at work, some of the senior partners are really getting up there.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

James Stinson: Someone order something tall dark and awesome.
 • Rating: Unrated

Barney: You guys are adorable. You honestly believe that I, Barney Stinson, can't talk you into this? I got the queen to give me a fist bump.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ted: The comfort of home is pretty much ruined when someone turns your-old room into what I'm pretty sure is a tantric sex temple. All the bamboo, pot smoke and 60's music, it's like my old G.I. Joes are frozen in some weird Vietnam flashback.
 • Rating: Unrated

Barney: Guys, I know you count the minutes until you can escape from your hum drum lives by hearing how awesome mine is.
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Barney: So this chick and I are going at it behind the Central Park Zoo, the bonobo chimps are giving us a standing O and just when I'm about to give her the same thing - what up?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 6 Episode 1: "Big Days"

Ted voiceover: Nothing in this life quite compares to the sweet exhilaration of making your move. When you just put it all on the line and go for it.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Lily: I could totally let you down. Has that thought not occurred to you?
Marshall: Not even for one second. Not having a baby would suck, but the idea of you letting me down, that's impossible. That would be like aliens landing. That's a bad example.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Barney: Dude you are so in, a high five doesn't cut it. High Six!
Ted: She didn't see us High Six did she?
Robin: No.
Barney: Good. That was pretty lame.
Ted: Yeah, let's never do that again.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Barney: You saucy little minx, you sun dressed up.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Barney: If I had my dad's number, I'd never not be on the phone with him.
Lily: Wow, that was really...
Barney: Whoa a hottie with a body! Boing!
Lily: Brief.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Lily: Why don't you have a baby with your dad?
Marshall: OK Lilly, why don't you have a baby with your butt?
Lily: What?
Marshall: I can't think straight! Why did you have to wear that shirt?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Marshall: So he gets no notice, he just walks into his boss's office and says to his boss, "I just had a grandson and I'm going to be out for three months."
 • Rating: Unrated

Are we missing your favorite "How I Met Your Mother" quote? Submit it here and get points for adding quotes!