Jersey Shore Season 1 Episode 2: "The Tanned Triangle" Quotes
If a girl's a slut, she should be abused.
Angelina
I feel like this job is beneath me, I'm a bartender. I do, like, great things.
Angelina
I wait till the last minute to shave, I wait till the last minute to put the shirt on 'cause you feel fresh. These are rules to live by, shave last minute, haircut the day-of, maybe some tanning and the gym. You gotta do the guido handbook.
Mike
With me and Sam, it's not a matter of if she wants to hook up with me; it's a matter of just when I decide.
Mike
Everybody loves me, babies, dogs, ya know, hot girls, cougars. I just have unbelievable mass appeal.
Mike
If you want to look somewhat like The Situation, which is gonna be pretty hard, you need to get that protein in your diet.
Mike
Everybody at the Shore definitely knows The Situation. As far as I know, everybody loves The Situation, and if you don't love The Situation, I'm gonna make you love The Situation.
Mike (The Situation)
I don't give a f**k if you're fat, you're ugly, you're 45 years old. I'll dance with ya. I think it's hilarious.
Vinny
You have your penis pierced. I love it... I just saw your penis.
JWOWW
