Modern Family
Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABCModern Family Quotes
If my daughter can stand up then so can I.
Mitchell
I am going to do what I am trained to do. I am going to lie, grovel, debase myself until I get what I want. I am a lawyer, damn it.
Mitchell
It's hard to sleep in a bed of lies, isn't it, Jay?
Gloria
To this day, Mitchell looks at me, I see him thinking 'that's the guy who killed Flyza Minnelli.'
Jay
I've been through this before. When Mitchell was 9, I was supposed to take care of his bird. It got out and flew into a fan. It was like a bloody pillow fight.
Jay
I know the pain is fresh, but the lie is really old.
Phil
Luke: You had a girlfriend before mom?
Phil: I had two!
Trust me, I had plenty of fun in my time. Then, I met your mom.
Phil
Women in their 30s on the internet are like ninjas. They get in their little, black outfits and try to sneak their way into your marriage.
Claire
Denise: How many other women have you led on?
Phil: I don't know now!
Never getting my driver's license, or getting one and the picture sucks.
Haley [on her biggest fear]
We can't ignore the giant panda in the room
Cam
