Phil: It's time, somebody warm some towels!
Claire: Every time I crack an egg, really?

• Permalink: Every time I crack an egg, really?
• Added: October 14, 2015

Okay, woah, this is exactly how it started out when I found out my father wasn't really in space.

Dylan

• Permalink: Okay, woah, this is exactly how it started out when I found out my father wasn't really in...
• Added: October 07, 2015

Mitchell: That was a take-out menu.
Earl: I don't want that man to know where I eat.

• Permalink: I don't want that man to know where I eat.
• Added: October 07, 2015

You're not working for the rolo-dex stealing Earl Chambers!

Jay

• Permalink: You're not working for the rolo-dex stealing Earl Chambers!
• Added: October 07, 2015

Lily: Where's the little leprechaun?
Cam: I think he's still getting dressed.

• Permalink: I think he's still getting dressed.
• Added: October 07, 2015

It's like being on a submarine, right?

Phil

• Permalink: It's like being on a submarine, right?
• Added: September 30, 2015

We call ourselves the artful lodgers.

Cam

• Permalink: We call ourselves the artful lodgers.
• Added: September 30, 2015

What is with you Americans and the foot?

Gloria

• Permalink: What is with you Americans and the foot?
• Added: September 30, 2015

As an actual glasses wearer, I find it offensive.

Alex

• Permalink: As an actual glasses wearer, I find it offensive.
• Added: September 30, 2015

All I wanted was to bribe my way into that school by making cubbies that stuff didn't fall out of.

Jay

• Permalink: All I wanted was to bribe my way into that school by making cubbies that stuff didn't fall...
• Added: September 23, 2015

We're like magnets, that sometimes take a break to date other magnets.

Dylan

• Permalink: We're like magnets, that sometimes take a break to date other magnets.
• Added: September 23, 2015

What's going on Daddy, are we poor?

Lily

• Permalink: What's going on Daddy, are we poor?
• Added: September 23, 2015