Tony: We can handle it.
Gibbs: What?
Tony: Bishop and I can handle the interviews. It might be better.
Gibbs: Better? What's better, DiNozzo? What are you trying to say? Spit it out.
Tony: Well your bedside manner might be....you might be too close to this.
Ducky: He's saying take a breath, Jethro! It's good advice for all of us.

Gibbs: He's going through a tough time.
Emily: Don't soft-pedal me Uncle Gibbs. He looks nuts with that bald head.
Gibbs: It was an undercover operation.
Emily: You don't believe that. Last week he shaved it twice in one day. Says it helps him feel clean. Since mom died he's been angry, bitter, self-destructive. Oh, and drunk. He's drinking way too much. You know what he's experiencing. I've tried to help but he doesn't listen to me and I've got my own grief to work through.
Gibbs: How's that going?
Emily: Some good days, some awful. All compounded by being a teenager who can't be expected to maintain a teenage social calendar if I'm too busy worrying about my father hurting himself or anyone else.
Gibbs: Okay I'll talk to him.
Emily: No. Help him. Please.
Gibbs: I will.

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Fornell: You said we were going after Sergei.
Gibbs: No, no. You said that. I said let's go.
Fornell: Which would imply agreement. What the hell are we doing out here? Wait a minute. An intervention? Is that what this is?
Gibbs: Do you think you need one?
Fornell: No! I mean last night was bad yes, but not bad enough to make any kind of New Age come-to-Jesus even remotely necessary.
Gibbs: Good. That's not what this is. No more slow-motion suicide Tobias. You want to kill yourself, fine with me. Go ahead. I'll even come with you.

Bishop: Well, family first. Not to mention your brave suggestion. He might just be too close.
Tony: Are you mocking me?
Bishop: Well, he obviously took it to heart.
Tony: Okay. Number one - that's adorable. And number two - Gibbs would never bail on a case much less a Sergei case much much less at my suggestion.
McGee: Unless he had a plan.

Fornell: I'm done.
Gibbs: You're done -- with what? Embarrassing yourself? Or you mean embarrassing the badge. You've done a good job with both. [Fornell punches Gibbs]
Gibbs: That all you got, Alice? [Fornell swings again and Gibbs shoves him through the door]

Gibbs: Do you feel better?
Fornell: We should be in D.C. looking for Sergei.
Gibbs: Not in this condition. Forget about Sergei. What's really bothering you?
Fornell: Don't Freud me Gibbs. You're not qualified.
Gibbs: You know what I'm asking.
Fornell: Back off.
Gibbs: You blame me.
Fornell: Jethro...
Gibbs: It's okay Tobias. I blame me. I'm the one who got her killed. If Diane wasn't on that rooftop she would be alive. And you wouldn't be walking around pretending like I wasn't the one who put her there.
Fornell: So it's all about you.
Gibbs: Yeah. It is all about me. And it's about you. And it's about Diane, and it's about the drinking and it's about all of it.
Fornell: No, my friend. It's just me. I killed her. No one to blame but myself. And I really need a drink.

Pavlenko: Which is why I called you - to help you rise, Sergei. With a proposal from the Russian government.
Mishnev: The government that wants me dead.
Pavlenko: I convinced them to give you asylum. Completely immunity, on one condition: kill Gibbs. Your vendetta has dragged on long enough. We need it to end.

Fornell: God I really do look like hell.
Gibbs: Did you think we were lying to you, Tobias?
Vance: Well it's nothing a hot shower can't fix.
Fornell: Amen to that, Leon. And a hot meal with my daughter.
Bishop: Well then, our timing's perfect.
Emily: And I was thinking more of sushi?
Fornell: Whatever you want baby. Whatever you need, it's yours.

Bishop: So. Military school, huh?
Tony: So. Yeah.
Bishop: Uniforms, PT, drills....
Tony: Those are all things that happen at military school, yes.
Bishop: How'd you end up there?
Tony: It was Senior's Hail Mary - trying to straighten me out after six boarding schools in four years.

Leave the gun, take the cannoli. The Godfather? Come on kid it's a classic.

Tanner

Tanner: The first night is usually the hardest. If you need me, I'm down the hall.
Young Tony: I'm 17, not 7. And this isn't my first new dorm room, new clothes, new teachers. Back off, buddy, okay?
Tanner: The name's not Buddy. It's Mr. Tanner. And from now on you are Cadet DiNozzo. Grab some rack time.

Gibbs: Then can we hack into, uh, his GPS REM thingy and backtrace his memory deal?
Abby: Um, none of those things are things Gibbs. One of them's a band and when someone turns their phone off there's nothing you can do. I mean it's off.

NCIS Quotes

McGee: All right. Well you should probably know that Abby and I used to date?
Bishop: Ew. Like, each other?
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: Wait - isn't that a violation of rule 12, never date a....
McGee: It was a long time ago. After we'd broken up, one night I went to her lab. Found a scribbled piece paper; a list. Potential boyfriends had to fulfill certain conditions by a pre-arranged date or else, goodbye.
Bishop: Such as.
McGee: Things started off relatively normal: opening the door for her, flowers, putting the seat down. Then around number 8, it gets uh...
Bishop: What?
McGee: Does she know you have these?
Bishop: Does she know you have these?
McGee: Yeah she wasn't happy when she found out.
Bishop: These are all very specific.
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: These ideas apply to you?
McGee: No those rules weren't in place when we were together. At least I don't think so.
Bishop: What's with the two month cutoff? Abby's sabotaging herself. I've seen stuff like this before. We have to talk to her.

McGee: Rule number 70 - keep digging till you hit bottom.
Abby: McGee! There is no rule 70.
McGee: Well, I--
Abby: You just made up a rule. This McGibbs thing has really gone to your head. I don't even recognize you right now.