McGee has been chosen to be the new face of NCIS. Isn't that great?


Vance: We need to coordinate transport for Qasim.
Gibbs: Excuse me?
Vance: These are orders from the State Department. Gibbs it's out of my hands.
Gibbs: What - the United States now cowers to terrorist demands?
Vance: I don't like it any more than you do, but a Marine's life is on the line.
Gibbs: So is Qasim's.

Bishop: We'll find another way, Qasim.
Qasim: My brother doesn't negotiate.
Bishop: Neither does Gibbs.
Qasim: I do not want any more bloodshed because of me. If sacrificing my life will save a Marine then it should be done.

Qasim: Who did you lose, exactly?
Bishop: A co-worker, a few years ago.
Qasim: It stays with you doesn't it? It's a heavy burden to bear alone.
Bishop: Look, I focus on the analytic aspects of things. That's where I'm effective. It's how I can best help people.
Qasim: And who is it that helps you? It's what we don't say that weighs the most. I hope you find the answers you're looking for.

Tony: You must have had a rough childhood. Normally I would take great pleasure in breaking a clown like you down nice and slow. But considering that you conspired with a terrorist and you are responsible for the torture and murder of a United States Marine, I'm a little pissed off and pressed for time.
Ashmore: Hey good cop. You wanna step in here?
McGee: You're on your own.

Bishop: What is it you expect me to do? Take down a whole village of insurgents on my own? That's not me. I'm an analyst.
Gibbs: I thought you were a field agent.
Bishop: Gibbs, whatever lesson you're trying to teach me is going to get Qasim and Corporal Collins killed. My job is in there, not out there.
Gibbs: Your job, Bishop, is to do what I tell you to do. You can do this.
Bishop: Don't put me in a position I'm not trained for.
Gibbs: Training's not the problem - you are. I told you, I got your back. Stop hiding behind things that are familiar, Bishop. You're better than that. The answers you want, Bishop - they're out there.

Qasim: Agent Gibbs, please pass along my gratitude to the other agents for capturing Landis' killer.
Gibbs: I'm not your messenger. Do it yourself. Come on - chop chop. Let's go. Hustle up.
Qasim: I don't understand.
Bishop: We put a call into the Secretary of the Navy. It took some convincing but after reading over fifty U.S. Marine statements on your behalf, she endorsed your special immigrant visa application. You're coming with us.
Qasim: To the United States to live?
Gibbs: Don't go getting all excited just yet.
Bishop: You'll be required to work at a translation post in D.C. while your visa's being processed. It's not negotiable.
Qasim: Where will I be found?
Gibbs: NCIS
Qasim: I believe I can manage that.

Bishop: Hi Mr. DiNozzo!
Tony Senior: Eleanor! If I was thirty years younger and you weren't married...oh my God.

Zoe: Should I go home, change first?
Tony: I see no reason to do that. I think you look exquisite.
Zoe: Thank you. I just want everything to go perfectly. To tell you the truth I'm a nervous wreck. I think I've seen Meet the Parents way too many times.
Tony: Well I can assure you my father is nothing like Robert DeNiro.
Gibbs: Come on, come on. Get to work.
Tony: Gibbs on the other hand...

Tony: I've been doing this a little longer than you and I know one thing: we've got to put pressure on them. Trust me.
Zoe: You know, I hate it when someone says "trust me". I immediately don't.
Tony: Are we having our first argument?

Senior: Such an ambitious undertaking by the father, you'd think that the son would show some appreciation.
Tony: I appreciate what you did to my kitchen!
Zoe: You know, I think I should just leave.
Tony: No no no no no no. Don't leave me with Wreck-It Ralph.
Zoe: We can just re-schedule.
Tony: No. Please, Zoe. I told you I wasn't exaggerating. This always happens. Thank God he lives in New York.

Tony: I don't know what I was thinking. I should have never suggested working with Keates. That was not a good idea. I would like to invoke Rule #12: never date a co-worker.

NCIS Quotes

Tony: One other question, I know you're an expert in English history. And I was just wondering, have you ever heard of Archibald Drummond, the 17th Earl of Trent?
Ducky: The Earl of Trent. No, I can't say I have. Why?
Tony: I was just wondering. Thanks.

McGee: All right. Well you should probably know that Abby and I used to date?
Bishop: Ew. Like, each other?
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: Wait - isn't that a violation of rule 12, never date a....
McGee: It was a long time ago. After we'd broken up, one night I went to her lab. Found a scribbled piece paper; a list. Potential boyfriends had to fulfill certain conditions by a pre-arranged date or else, goodbye.
Bishop: Such as.
McGee: Things started off relatively normal: opening the door for her, flowers, putting the seat down. Then around number 8, it gets uh...
Bishop: What?
McGee: Does she know you have these?
Bishop: Does she know you have these?
McGee: Yeah she wasn't happy when she found out.
Bishop: These are all very specific.
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: These ideas apply to you?
McGee: No those rules weren't in place when we were together. At least I don't think so.
Bishop: What's with the two month cutoff? Abby's sabotaging herself. I've seen stuff like this before. We have to talk to her.