New Girl Quotes
Jess: So Nick doesn't have a traditional career.
Nick: Or is it the MOST traditional career? Or am I thinking of prostitution?
- Permalink: Or is it the MOST traditional career? Or am I thinking of prostitution?
I was the ninth guy off the bench for the eighth-best team in Latvia.Winston
- Permalink: I was the ninth guy off the bench for the eighth-best team in Latvia.
Have I ever made any decisions in my whole life? Are we just living in the mind of a giant?Winston
Sick people wanted me, dying people wanted to be me--I was the total candy striping package.Schmidt
Coach: Do people call you 'Marketing'?
Schmidt: No...not yet...
- Permalink: No...not yet...
She's looking for career advice, and your job could be done by a vending machine.Schmidt
When I think of teachers, I think of two things--Jessica Day, and pornography...where one of the characters is...a teacher.Schmidt
I thought you said you were afraid of camping and nature. You said you were afraid a fly was going to fly in your head and learn all your thoughts.Jess
So I have good news from the doctor--you don't have rabies. You have giardia, and something called "Legionnaires disease."Nick
I should have known those beets weren't from nature. Nothing purple comes from nature.Nick
The eyeball fell off, that's how you know it's good!Nick
- Permalink: The eyeball fell off, that's how you know it's good!
Guys, we've gone soft! With our antibiotics and our sports creams!Nick
- Permalink: Guys, we've gone soft! With our antibiotics and our sports creams!
I'm not convinced I know how to read, I've just memorized a lot of words.Nick
- Permalink: I'm not convinced I know how to read, I've just memorized a lot ...
I'm gonna bake a cake so moist, girls are gonna be like, 'Ewww, why did you say moist? I hate that word?' and I'm gonna be like, 'Taste the cake!' And they're gonna be like, 'Damn, it's moist!'"Coach