New Girl

Tuesdays 9:00 PM on FOX
New girl
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Hi there. I'm about to ruin a date and don't want to show up empty-handed.

Nick: What the hell are you doing?
Coach: Making island beats.

Are you a do-er, or a dumpling-er?


The internet said I had to stay off my feet. But then I found this wheelchair in a ditch, so...I'm ready to work out!


Did I leave my Oakland Raiders yarmulke over there?


Peanuts is an acronym! It stands for "Physical Education Activity...Nuts!"


Are you okay to drive? You've got crazy eyes!


Coach: Remember when you sat out of the game because you were sad?
Winston: I was also cold.

Coach: His jeans are so small.
Nick: Looks like a puppet, like something an Italian whittled

Is that Notorious N.A.G.? Is that Naggie Gyllenhaal?


Oh, look at the time! It's butt-o-clock!


Nick doesn't have a life plan. He doesn't have a day plan. I once found a note that he wrote to himself that said, "Put on pants."

Displaying quotes 121 - 132 of 553 in total

New Girl Quotes

I'm not convinced I know how to read, I've just memorized a lot of words.


I'm gonna bake a cake so moist, girls are gonna be like, 'Ewww, why did you say moist? I hate that word?' and I'm gonna be like, 'Taste the cake!' And they're gonna be like, 'Damn, it's moist!'"