Sandwiches and sex!? I want that!


Schmidt: You like me? You like my personality?
CeCe: I was surprised, too.

Boobies. Girls with clean hair. Models eating sliders. Bernadette Peters on a high beam. Freshly baked bread.

Winston [teasing Schmidt]

Jess: Nick put on some pants or at least some really high socks.
Nick: Really high socks it is then!

Sarah: Do you and my Dad ever dry-lump?
Jess: Uhhh..
Sarah: Have you ever done a 99?
Jess: I think that's a tax form?
Sarah: Have you ever given anyone a plow job?
Jess: I don't you want to learn how to play Bridge?

Nick is so, so, so hot! I want to rub my face on his face!


Schmidt: CeCe, are you pregnant?
CeCe: I don't know. We have to wait for the test results, but I'm late.
Schmidt: We made a caramel miracle!

An Indian-Jewish baby? Who wouldn't want that? Think about the bone structure!


Sorry. I've never heard you talk about your ex wife, and I got really nervous, and I tried to flirt information out of you.


[to Winston] You're listening to the radio and writing with a pen? What decade are we in?


Actually, I don't trust what "cool" means to all of you, so how about just " be normal".


Winston: So nice to meet you, Mr. Kareem Abdul Jabbar. Can I sit on your shoulders?
Kareem: Sure!
Winston: Really?
Kareem: No!

New Girl Quotes

I'm not convinced I know how to read, I've just memorized a lot of words.


Get rid of it, Jess. Pine has no place in this loft. It's the wood of poor people and outhouses.