Season: 2 1
New Girl Quotes (Page 5)
Season 2 Episode 15: "Cooler"

Jess: Nick, I need you.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Nick: Band of Brothers!
Schmidt: Your friendship means nothing to me. Every man for himself!
• Rating: Unrated
Schmidt: I'm gonna have sex tonight. Are you two in?
Winston: Is that the way you wanted to say that?
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Schmidt: Dammit! Been trying to get something going with myself for a full hour. It's like a taffy pole on a hot summer's day.
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Nick: This coat has clean lines and pockets that just don't quit.
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Season 2 Episode 14: "Pepperwood"

Edgar: Oh my God, you smell like waffles.
Edgar's girlfriend: Want to eat me up?
Edgar: Yes, I do.
• Rating: Unrated
Edgar's mom: Don't ask about the duffle bag, bitch!
• Rating: Unrated
Nick: You're the deer! He wants to kill you! You're the deer!
• Rating: Unrated
Schmidt: They make shoes for your penis! They're called pants!
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Schmidt: Winston said you make fun of my gremlin toenails. That you call them clickety-clacks or centaur boots.
• Rating: Unrated
Schmidt: A pogo is what your friends talk about when you leave the room.
Cece: Oh like your barnacle toenails?
• Rating: Unrated
Jess: What are you, the doodle police?
• Rating: Unrated
Schmidt: I know what my pogo is. It's that I dance like a sea snake.
• Rating: Unrated
Winston: I wanted to talk to you about the regrettable contact between Cece's...her down there and my...parts.
Schmidt: You practically shish-kebabed her.
• Rating: Unrated
Cece:Do you have any agave?
Schmidt: We might have some pressed lentils syrups in the mixin's cabinet.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Girl in the class: He was a merman. He was the last of his kind and he needed a mother for his merchild. He was not a mergentleman.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 2 Episode 13: "A Father's Love"

Schmidt: I had only sari related sexual ideas. Monsoon Bedding, Best Erotic Maribone Hotel,Slumdoggy Style Millionaire!
• Rating: Unrated
Schmidt: We can form an Ocean's Twelve. I will be Brad Pitt. You will be the crafty Asian who does the flippies.
• Rating: Unrated
Jess: There's more to A Father's Love than just semen! Ew!
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Schmidt: Let's concentrate on the smite later.
• Rating: Unrated
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Season: 2 1
Total Season 2 Quotes: 193
Total New Girl Quotes: 372



