New Girl

New Girl

Tuesdays 9:00 PM on FOX

Latest Review

Season: 2 1

New Girl Quotes (Page 6)

Season 2 Episode 13: "A Father's Love"

Jess: I should have brought my stethoscope. I'm seeing a lot of split ends. The cut is all wrong for the shape of its face.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Nick: He lures you in with his charm, his mustache, and his perfect hair!
 • Rating: Unrated
Schmidt: Nick, please do not angry-fix the sink.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 2 Episode 12: "Cabin"

Nick: If you were a hat, you'd be a top hat. But like a really big Monopoly one. And I say that with deepest compliments.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Nick: I can't believe I'm the sober one. That's actually never happened before in my life.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Jess: But I need like a backstory, like why am I mad at the can?
Angie: The can is your ex-boyfriend and he did not respect your space and thought that your arts and crafts section of your house was ridiculous.
Jess: What?!
Angie: Yeah, enough?
 • Rating: Unrated
Winston: So that means you're gonna do whatever I say?
Schmidt: I mean as long as it's gangsta...or not. It doesn't have to be.
 • Rating: Unrated
Schmidt: I wanna be the black friend you never had.
 • Rating: Unrated
Schmidt: You were so light and charming you were like Pixar Winston.
 • Rating: Unrated
Sam: Can we just concentrate on the fact that like I was tripping pretty hard on the Absinthe and I said no to a stripper.
 • Rating: Unrated
Winston: There's nothing like the feel of a fire, a fresh baked cookie and the sweet, sweet taste of crack in your lungs.
 • Rating: Unrated
Nick: Fantasy and nightmare colliding.
 • Rating: Unrated
Schmidt: Let's let Winston turn on his black switch. And let his black light shine.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Jess: You're dating a stripper, I'm dating a tall handsome doctor. We're kinda living the dream.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 2 Episode 11: "Santa"

Jess: I don't know the words!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Schmidt: There's two of you! I thought we were in the middle of a budget crisis!
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Nick: I'm very poor. Having a checking account would be an honor. I've written a zombie book. It's terrible. I'm a slow runner. I'm obsessed with karate.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Schmidt: I don't celebrate Christmas, or as I like to call it, "White Anglo Saxon Winter Privilege Night."
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Nick: What happens in the sleigh is that I'll be your reindeer and take your toys to the sky.
 • Rating: 2.0 / 5.0
Jess: You're too late. I'm in love. With Winston.
Winston: You know, it just got stuck up there so far, so quickly.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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Season: 2 1
Total Season 2 Quotes: 193
Total New Girl Quotes: 372
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