New Girl

Tuesdays 9:00 PM on FOX
New girl
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I've got an uncle whose God-given name is 'Shifty.'


She is sleeping. By herself. Which is called napping.


Crazy girls are kind of my 'Hurt Locker.'


Girl, I got an a...sandwich...meeting.


Ooh, bonus shot of Dad getting a haircut while eating spaghetti!


Have you seen a girl who looks like me, but with chaos in her eyes?


Why lie? You know how many Millers have been or currently are in jail?


I just need to get to Rachel before he tells her horrible-slash-true things about me.


Schmidt: It's a bar mitzvah!
Nick: I am NOT watching a kid get circumcised.

Nick: I just want to make a good impression on Jess's sister.
Schmidt: Yeah, well, I want Julia Child not to be dead, but here we find ourselves.

Sorry to interrupt--I know the morning is the most sensual time of day.

Jess's Mom

Nick: Men don't talk to people they've dated, unless they want sex, or they're Winston.
Winston: I also want sex.

Displaying quotes 61 - 72 of 547 in total

New Girl Quotes

I'm gonna bake a cake so moist, girls are gonna be like, 'Ewww, why did you say moist? I hate that word?' and I'm gonna be like, 'Taste the cake!' And they're gonna be like, 'Damn, it's moist!'"


I'm not convinced I know how to read, I've just memorized a lot of words.

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