How do you make every outfit look like pajamas?

Zoey

Coop hurt my feelings. He basically said that he never liked my hair... so now I'm gonna feel stuff?

Jackie: Do you know who the father is?
O'Hara: No. I want it to be a surprise.

Playa hear ya, loud and clearya.

Zoey

I'm toning my uterus.

O'Hara

I don't have a thing for doctors, I have a thing for drugs.

When you're a hammer, everything looks like a nail.

Dr. Cruz

Welcome to the sh-t show.

I'm not a good breaker-upper.

Zoey

Spanx are a fu*king miracle until they go rogue on you.

Divorce Lawyer

Home is home, work is work.

Mike Cruz

Mike Cruz: Thanks for that by the way.
Jackie: You owe me one.
Mike Cruz: No I don't.
Jackie: That works too.

Nurse Jackie Quotes

Don't ever say "ta-da." The only people that say "ta-da" are magicians or idiots.

Jackie Peyton

Percoset should never be crushed and chewed, unless you want it to hit your system like a bolt of lightening. Which is only a problem if you're afraid of lightening.

Jackie Peyton