Because this tree is strong and quite, and always there when you need it. Or whatever.

Ron

I change my locks every 16 days. That key's been useless since the 2nd Tuesday I gave it to you.

Ron

Ben: Now one's ever asked me how my kids are or who's taking care of them. By the way who's taking care of them?
Leslie: My -- my mom, everythings fine.

I love how independent my wife is, and for that reason, I will not let her speak! That came out wrong.

Ben

Gerry: Gale might even call me the "b" word. Bozo.
Donna: Wow, we are very different people.

Andy: Ohh babe you had a crush on me, that's emabrassing!
April: We're married.
Andy: Still!

It's an impossible puzzle, and I love puzzles!

Ron

She's an exceptional human being, who married a well-intentioned goof ball.

Ben

Leslie: You wanted to run something by me?
April: Yes. So well you help me?
Leslie: you don't need me! You can get whatever job you want!

I just want to say thank you, and I love you very much. Which is why I decided not to turn you into a sea urchin, which I can do, because I'm an actual witch, with powers, and I'm evil, and -

April

I just fell backwards into your world, a couple years went by, and now here I am.

April

She'll take it! Lets talk perks. Does she get the summer off like school?!

Andy

Parks & Rec Quotes

Every now and then, we have these little gatherings, and Leslie gets plastered. One time, I convinced her to try to fax someone a Fruit Roll Up. She, one time, made out with the water delivery guy. In her office. On Halloween, she was dressed up as Batman. Not Batgirl; Batman. And I convinced her to go stop a crime that was going on outside. And it is my favorite thing in the world.

Tom Haverford

This could be my Hoover Dam.

Leslie