Scrubs Season 3 Quotes
Dr. Cox: Enjoy. I didn't cut the hand off - I used a different puppet for that.
Dr. Norris: Well, if you want, you could give that one to me and I could fix it. And have it... for the kids.
J.D.: S-sh-I don't care, Sean! Come on, Turk!
Turk: Hey. I just wanted you to know I don't have a problem with you, I just can't resist a good storm-off.
Sean: Oh, who can?
Dr. Cox: You have kids?
Dr. Norris: One. She hates dolls.
Dr. Cox: Boy, that's a bummer.
Dr. Norris: Tell me about it.
Elliot: And... the reason that I came back here is because you said that Bruce and I are alike. And you know what? You're right. Because you're treating him the exact same way you treated me when I first got here! Dr. Kelso, you only judge us by these, like, twenty-minute, pressure-filled windows that you see us through twice a week, and you-you never get to know us or how hard we really work. Because, if you did, you'd realize that a lot of the times we fail, it's not our fault - it's yours.
Dr. Kelso: Is that how you feel, future dentist?
Bruce: W-well... sometimes you make me feel like... I can't do anything well, and I can do lots of things well!
Dr. Kelso: Like what?
Bruce: I'm a pretty solid human beat-box.
Elliot: Bru-Bruce, I think he was talking about medical... things.
Bruce performs a beatboxing routine
Elliot: Oh, my God, Bruce! That was amazing! Where did you learn how to do that?
Bruce: In temple.
J.D.: Hey, Sean, you were right about me and my interns. I guess I owe you an apology.
Carla: Damn straight, you do! You know what your problem is, Bambi? You're-
Turk picks her up and carries her off.
Carla: Oh! Turk! Please? Just one more second? I need the rush! Please? I'm coming back for you!
Sean: J.D., it's no big deal. We both know that it wasn't about that. Well, you... you like Elliot.
J.D.: Sorry.
Sean: Don't sweat it.
J.D.: You're not pissed off? I'd be pissed off. Why aren't you pissed off?
Sean: I dunno. I guess I just... I don't see you as that much of a threat.
J.D.: Ohh... Cool.
Elliot: Dr. Cox, does this shade of red make me look like a clown?
Dr. Cox: No, barbie, no...it makes you look like a prostitute who caters exclusively to clowns.
Turk: All right, fine, man! I can have plenty of deep moments with The Todd!
Todd: You think gay dudes get turned on by their own wieners?
Carla: Who left this urine here?
Dr. Cox: Someone's got a secret admirer!
Carla: Dr. Kelso? Someone left this urine specimen sitting around. What's interesting is that the name tag's been ripped right off.
Dr. Kelso: Sweetheart, I think you're confusing interesting with boring.
Turk: You know, I'm actually starting to like Journey.
J.D.: Well you're gonna be very pleased with the next twenty-three songs.
Turk: Okay, Um... Ever since Carla and I set the date for the wedding, I started thinking. You know those lame-ass couples that get engaged but they never actually get married - they just cruise along, year after year, without making any real kind of commitment?
J.D.: Uh-huh?
Turk: Dude, I wanted to be one of those couples, man!
