Is that something I'd want to do? Is the Pope Catholic and making the world safe for pedophiles?

Cartman

When a chick says we need to talk, you might as well start punching yourself in the balls, dude.

Cartman

And it will be like a taco inside taco within a Taco Bell that's inside a KFC that's within a mall that's inside your dream!

Doctor

Sea Man: Swallow, come.
Moses: Hehe, no way he just said that.

This is the way the world works, if you want want to fine some quality friends you have to wade through all the dicks fist.

Cartman

Revenge is a dish best served chili.

Scott Tenorman

Hindsight: what is your power?
Kenny (as Mysterion): I can't die. I've experienced death countless times. Sometimes, I see a bright light. Sometimes, I see Heaven or Hell. But eventually, no matter what, I wake up in my bed wearing my same old clothes. The wort part? No one even remembers me dying. I go to school the next day and everyone is just like "Oh, Hey Kenny," even if they had seen me get decapitated with their own eyes. You want to whine about Curses, Hindsight? You're talking to the wrong f**king cowboy.

Stan: Mom says to stop trying to give yourself cancer.
Randy: Just gonna get a little bit of cancer, Stan, tell mom it's okay.

Cartman: Hey, you guys, this is just like that one movie and John Travolta and that French chick all summer long and they went back to school and sang songs about grease lightning, you know, that movie which the mean chick is all prissy, but that tiny chick has an abortion...
Stan and Kyle: Cartman, will you shut the hell up and get some more rope?
Cartman: Ah, screw you guys anyway.

Will somebody put this retard out of his misery?

Cartman

Butterflies have no concern for such things. Now I'm gonna go find myself some butterfly poon.

Randy

All Coon friends report to base. I'm so seriously.

Cartman

South Park Quotes

Stan: Hey Cartman, how come the birthday invitation you gave me says "Green Megaman."
Kyle: Yeah, mine says "Red Megaman."
Cartman: Right, that's what your supposed to get me for my birthday.
Stan: DUDE!?!?! You're not supposed to tell people what to give you for your birthday!
Kyle: Yeah, that's weak.
Cartman: Look it's very simple guys. "Green Megaman" goes with "Red Megaman" and "Yellow Megaman" to make the "Ultra Mega Megaman." You have to have all 3 or it doesn't work, see?
Stan: Up yours Cartman, I'll get you whatever the hell I want.
Cartman: Ohh!!! so maybe you don't want to have any of my moms Cake, Pie, and Ice cream then.
Stan: Oh "Gre..Green Megaman" it is.
Cartman: Now as you can see Kenny, you are to get me "Yellow Megaman," that's because the "Yellow Megaman" is the cheapest one and I know how poor your family is.
(Damien walks to table)
Stan: Hey!?!?! what do you think you're doing new kid?
Cartman: Yeah, you can't sit with us weirdo.
Damien: Infidel's!!!! I will turn you all into "Beasts of Burden"!
Kyle: You can't sit with us new kid, go find another table!
(Damien goes and sits with Pip)
Cartman: (sighs) Anyway Kenny, "Yellow Megaman" is only $8.95, so maybe your mom can put it on layaway and make payments in a year, or two.
(Stan, Kyle, and Cartman laugh. Kenny punches Cartman)
Cartman: AYYY!!!!

It's a man's obligation to stick his boneration in a woman's separation, this sort of penetration will increase the population of the younger generation.

</i> Cartman