South Park

As we've been going through old South Park seasons as part of our Classic TV Quotes feature, we've been eagerly anticipating season five.  Why?  Two words: Scott Tenorman.

If we could ask for just two more, it'd be "Scott Tenorman Must Die."  Call us sick.  Call us twisted.  But, without a doubt, out of the two hundred plus episodes of our favorite Colorado-based cartoon, this episode still takes the prize for us.

Sure there were plenty of other memorable episodes including the introduction of the "Super Best Friends" and even the lamest ancillary character, "Towelie."  Overall, the fifth season was one of the strongest in the show's history.

So to honor Scott and one of our favorite seasons, we present our favorite South Park quotes from the fourteen episode run:

Head Scoutmaster: Oh, Big Gay Al, it has recently come to our attention that you are gay.
Big Gay Al: Well, stop the presses, did you figure that out all by yourselves, silly buns? | permalink

Jesus: We need to know how to kill a giant stone Abraham Lincoln.
Moses: Um, let me think, um... A giant stone John Wilkes Booth? | permalink

Cartman: They may take our pride, but THEY MAY NEVER TAKE MY GODDAMN $16.12!!! | permalink

Cartman: I made you eat your parents! I made you eat your parents! | permalink

Kyle: Dude, I think it might be best for us to never piss Cartman off again.
Stan: Good call. | permalink

(After licking Scott's tears off the table)
Cartman: Ohhh, the tears of unfathomable sadness, mmm, yummy yummy you guys! | permalink

After the hilarious, censored two-part 200th episode spectacular, we weren't exactly sure what Matt Stone and Trey Parker were going to throw at us, but we were definitely hoping for something better than "Crippled Summer."

The episode was clearly divided into two story lines: the South Park boys staging an Intervention (parodying the A&E show) for Towelie, while Jimmy went up against Nathan in a color war at their handicap camp, Camp Tardicaca.  Yes, the two story lines were loosely tied together by Towelie's job at the camp and the Intervention style facts through the the episode, but it was a very loose connection.

While Towelie has been played out over the years, we actually enjoyed most of his intervention storyline.  The strongest part of the episode was the intervention itself at the end.  Between Butters heart-felt speech to Cartman's several hundred page rant against the Jews, we loved it.

We're glad it was Wash Cloth that won Towelie over.  Sure we seem to remember Towelie being some sort of robot that probably shouldn't be able to reproduce, let alone with a human, but it's the humanizing element to the towel that makes him so good.  "Who hired that towel?  It can barely walk, let alone dry someone off."

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After setting up multiple epic story lines with last week's "200" episode, why open part two with a ridiculous Vietnam war sequence featuring Mitch Conner (Cartman's hand puppet).  We were just relived to see the guys were going to give us part two and not a Terrance and Phillip special.

From there, the episode quickly joined up with its story lines, merged them together, and pushed the over-censored, ridiculousness that is the Muhammad issue to the max.  For part two?  Even the prophet's name was bleeped, while Jesus was addicted to Internet porn and Buddha just couldn't get enough of his blow.

So what did we think of "201?"  Well, first off, as an editor's note, we are extremely biased this week.  Our favorite episode of all time, "Scott Tenorman Must Die" was not only referenced, but Tenorman became central to the plot line.  For any South Park fan,this plot and Cartman's big father reveal was perfection.

The rest of the episode contained plenty of throwbacks much like "200," giving almost everyone and everything from the past some nice cameos including Pip, Mr. Hankey, Mickey Mouse, Raisins, and even the whale.  We wouldn't have been shocked if Hussein and Satan made an appearance.

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It was the 200th episode of South Park and Matt Stone and Trey Parker had plenty of material to cover in its 12 year history as a fun throwback episode.

The premise started off simple: Stan called Tom Cruise a fudge packer on a school trip, prompting Cruise to gather the "200" celebrities that South Park (the town, of course) has insulted over the years.  From there the episode moved to to bringing back Muhammad, "Mecha-Streisand," the gingers, the Mitch Connors slash Jennifer Lopez hand, Mr. Hat, and questioning Cartman's true father.

While we've had the luxury of reading other reviews before posting ours this week, we see the rest of the Internet did not seem to be a fan.  We have to tell you, after being loyal fans of this show since the start, there was so many throwbacks it was impossible not to love.

Rather than being a lame clips episode, every joke that was re-explored found plenty of new material.  Plus, plenty of celebrities got all new jokes at their expense, particularly Tim Burton and Jimmy Buffet.

We also very much enjoyed the fact that the guys recognized the fact they had shown Muhammad back in the 2001 Superfriends episode, despite claiming not be able to show him the 2005 episode, and of course, in this episode as a central plot point. 

How times have changed since this show made its debut 200 episodes before.  Besides not being able to show Muhammad, we now got to see Mecha-Streisand in all her terrifying 3-D glory.

Now we're curious if South Park will actually conclude its cliff hanger episode next week, or like the last time they left us with a cliff hanger over Cartman's father, we'll just get a Terrance and Phillip episode.

Our favorite South Park quotes from the episode after the jump.

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We're actually kind of shocked South Park took this long to come up with a Facebook parody episode. We're talking about a show that's been known to mock current events within mere weeks of them happening.  I'm not even sure how they write the storyline for those episodes, let along animate and voice them in time.

However, nearly six years after the website's inception, South Park have given the phenomenon the same treatment they gave World of Warcraft years ago: an entire episode dedicated to it, "You Have 0 Friends."

Maybe it's good that Parker and Stone waited, because the episode was really able to nail just how ridiculous Facebook has become at this point in the game.  Whether it was Stan's father and grandmother joining, Wendy getting jealous over an 83 year old woman's comments, or Kyle constantly nagging Stan to help him in Farmville, everything in the episode has probably happened to you.

Well, except for maybe that whole being sucked into a Tron-like universe when you attempt to delete your account.  We may never know for sure though, because who's really willing to risk deleting their profile and losing all their friends, comments, and status history!?

While the Tron scenes had some great moments like people just saying "ignore" or audibly announcing their statuses, our favorite part by far was that all battles were determined by Yahtzee.  Great parody of the horrible games that somehow dominate Facebook.

Kyle, meanwhile, went on his own quest to find friends, after losing all his friends due to friending the friendless Kip.  Kyle enlisted the help of Cartman, who hosted a web blog, Mad Friends, which was, of course, a pretty funny take on Jim Cramer's Mad Money. 

Although clearly the B story of the two, Kyle, Cartman and Kip's adventure was the ultimate satire of Facebook.  People really have looked to Facebook and following statuses as ways of legitimately keeping up with friends.  It's a scary world we live in when Facebook and reality are blending together.

Before we go into a random, tangent rant, we'll stick to reviewing the episode that did it for us.  It was a great parody, but just a decent episode that could have had more LOL moments.  Sorry, too much Facebook.  Our favorite South Park quotes after the jump.

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After being on the air for fourteen seasons, we know it's probably no longer cool to say South Park may still be the most brilliant show on television.  But, after a mediocre season premiere, and a decent follow up last week, this season's third installment, "Medicinal Fried Chicken," was perfection to us.

It was classic South Park in that it was a brilliant political satire behind one of the most ridiculous plot lines that included Randy and the guys bouncing around on their enlarged testicles from testicular cancer, while Cartman joined a KFC smuggling ring that led to him cutting up fried chicken skin with a credit card and snorting it.

To say only on South Park is an understatement.  While a show like Family Guy would have no problem going for the gross out factor the enlarged testicles, few other shows would have the satire behind the storyline.

In this case, the show took on the ridiculousness that is medicinal marijuana.  If you're going to legalize the stuff, just legalize it, and not hide it behind a veiled medical concealment.  As Randy discovered on the show, he was too healthy to qualify for the stuff.

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South Park decided to play homage to the recently deceased J.D. Salinger's classic, The Catcher in the Rye, after mocking Tiger Woods last week   The episode mocked the silly controversy surrounding the book that supposedly inspired Mark David Chapman to kill John Lennon and the inappropriateness that is tame by today's standards. 

The always easily manipulated Butters clearly was influenced by the novel, having frequent blackouts and the desire to kill John Lennon and Ronald Reagan, only to find out both were already dead.  Stan and the boys, meanwhile, were clearly unimpressed and decided they were going to write their own offensive novel, "The Tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs," from which the episode gets its title.

The novel is instantly a hit among the parents, and the boys blame the novel on Butters, trying to avoid getting in trouble, only to give him credit for a national treasure.  This treasure, of course, being a terrible book written by fourth graders that is clearly be over-analyzed by the adults.  Mocking Harry Potter, Twilgiht, and other young adult novels that are swallowed up by adults, perhaps?

Overall, the episode had some great pop culture references between the recent death of J.D. Salinger and the show's blatant thirty minutes of ripping on Sarah Jessica Parker and the useless Kardashian Klan.  Most of the jokes revolved around cultural icons, past and present, including called John Lennon the king of hippies.  Fantastic.

While the episode may not have been as strong as previous seasons, it was definitely better than the season fourteen premiere to us.  Plus, it heavily featured Butters.  Everyone loves Butters. Our favorite South Park quotes from the episode are after the jump.

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South Park returns with new episodes in just under two short weeks, but we still can't wait that long!  That's why we've gone back and added season four quotes for you.

Season four was an epic one for the boys of South Park and had long term repercussions.  Why?  Because it was the only year in the show's 13 seasons that the boys have aged. 

That's right, season four was the season in which the boys entered "4th Grade."  Don't worry, season four had plenty of other memorable moments as well.

Whether it was Cartman's trapper keeper attempting tot ake over the world, Satan reuniting with Saddam Hussein, or the formation of the ultimate boy band, Finger Bang, it was a great season.

Just check out some of our favorite South Park quotes and be sure and vote for your favorites:

Chef: Well look at you cute little crackers with your money and your fancy clothes and your cell phones. It's almost like you wereOh my God! Children, what have I told you about drugs?
Stan, Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny: There's a time and a place for everything and it's called college. | permalink

Judge: I am making an example of you to send a message out to people everywhere: that if you want to hurt another human being, you'd better make damn sure they're the same color as you are. | permalink

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So come on down to South Park and read some quotes of ours.  We've just finished adding the third season of South Park quotes, and boy did this season have some of our favorite episodes.

Whether it was South Park mocking episode 1 of Star Wars with "Jackovasaurus" or Cartman's S'more Schnapps fueled army marching across America in "The Red Badge of Gayness" just so he could win a bet, this is easily one of our favorite seasons.

So now comes the tough part for us.  Picking our editor's picks of our favorite quotes from the 284 South Park season three quotes we added to the system. 

No, it wasn't easy having to read through that many quotes and laugh as hard as we did.  But don't worry, you'll have your chance to do the same once you go over our favorite South Park quotes below:

Ms. Stevens: I'm leaving some pamphlets up here on the desk if anyone is interested.
Cartman: Oh good. We could use some more toilet paper. | permalink

Father Maxi: Boys, I haven't seen you in church lately.
Kyle: Well, I'm Jewish.
Father Maxi: You're not too Jewish to worship Jesus, are you? | permalink

Cartman: I swear if you call me 'Piggy' one more time, I will rip your balls off with my bare hands!
Eye doctor: Piggy. | permalink

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After ending season one of South Park with a cliffhanger, Matt Stone and Trey Parker decides to give us a lovely April Fool's season two premiere about a completely unrelated Terrance and Phillip adventure.

Don't worry, by episode two, they wrapped up the mystery of who Cartman's father was.  Spoiler alert: it was Cartman's mom, she's a hermaphrodite.

From there, season two went on to give us such wonderful things as Cartman as a cop ("respect my authority!"), the conjoined fetus nurse, Chef's chocolate salty balls, and the infamous "Chef Aid."

Yeah, season two was a big year for the residents of South Park so it's time to celebrate with the largest collection of South Park season two quotes.

If you haven't caught on by now, we're going to end this post with our hand-picked best of season two South Park quotes, so enjoy:

Jimbo: Well, looks like we're not going anywhere for a long time.
Director: We're snowed in?
Mayor: Yes! We're trapped!
Mr. Garrison: Like sailors on a submarine...
Mayor: My god, this is the worst storm I have ever seen!
Director's Assistant: Oh, I have to get out of here; I haven't eaten since breakfast.
Officer Barbrady: Yeah, I'm getting kind of hungry, too!
Jimbo: I hope you all don't realize what we're facing here... Our only option might be to...eat each other to stay alive. | permalink

Cartman: Ey! I am a cop, and you will respect my authoritah! | permalink

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