South Park

South Park "Obama Wins!" Quotes

Morgan Freeman: So we have to ask ourselves, what's more important? That the right man is elected president, or that Star Wars is with people who will protect it most?
 • Rating: Unrated

Hummer Dealer: Not sure what to get your loved one this holiday season? Why not give them a nice Hummer? Nothing beats a Hummer on Christmas morning!
 • Rating: Unrated

Cartman: I can get the ballots for you. But if I'm going to smuggle them here, I'm going to need a blast suit and a tauntaun.
Mickey Mouse: Sure thing, I've got tauntauns coming out my asshole! Ha-ha!
 • Rating: Unrated

Cartman: So here's the deal, General Tso, Mr. President: when the Chinese make the sequels, I get to play the part of Luke Skywalker's son. Cartman Skywalker.
General Tso: That was not the deal! We will not be bullied by you!
Cartman: Then I guess we're about to play a game of chicken, General Tso!
Jimmy: I get it, "General Tso's Chicken!"
 • Rating: Unrated

Stan: Just one thing, Morgan Freeman: how come every time something convoluted needs explaining, you show up?
Morgan Freeman: Because every time I show up and explain something, I earn a freckle.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

South Park Resident: Wow, the president eats at Red Lobster! He's just a normal guy like me!
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Stan: I don't understand that stuff at all, I need Morgan Freeman to explain it to me.
Jimmy: Yeah, I love when Morgan Freeman explains stuff.
Clyde: Whenever I'm confused about what's going on in a movie, I'm always so relieved when Morgan Freeman shows up and explains the plot to me.
 • Rating: 4.2 / 5.0

Obama: I don't know how they did it, but the Chinese secured my victory. I have to fulfill my obligation.
Presidential Staff: And what if General Tso suddenly gets the courage to go to the press with all this?
Obama: Don't worry, everyone knows General Tso's chicken.
 • Rating: Unrated

Cartman: Pretty sweet, huh?
Kyle: What the hell is this?
Cartman: What's it look like? Hundreds of thousands of votes from all the swing states.
Kyle: I don't believe it.
Cartman: No really, there are states full of swingers. Bunch of perverts if you ask me.
 • Rating: Unrated

Flight Attendant: Would you like some warm nuts, sir?
Cartman: Haahaha! Warm nuts, she says!
 • Rating: Unrated

Are we missing your favorite quote from "Obama Wins!?" Submit it here and get points for adding quotes!