South Park

Wednesdays 10:00 PM on Comedy Central
South park
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Earth Day Person: (waves hands) You don't care about Terrance and Phillip. Nothing matters more than saving the planet from Republicans. You don't need to see Terrance and Phillip.
Stan: No, dude, we really, really do.
Earth Day Person: (to woman) Their will is strong.

Earth Day Person: And Terrance and Phillip are more important than Mother Earth?
Cartman: Well yeah, dude.

(waves hand) Global warming is going to kill us all. The Republicans are responsible.

Earth Day Person


Beef and lamb, chicken and ham,
Step to the left and clap your hands.
Gosh we love that chicken and ham.
Don't let it go to waste, chicken and ham.
clapping sound
Beef and lamb, chicken and ham,
Step to the left and clap your hands.
Got a little left, chicken and ham.
Don't let it go to waste, chicken and ham.
Beef and lamb, chicken and ham,
Step to the left and clap your hands.
Gosh we love that chicken and ham.
Don't let it go to waste, chicken and ham.

<i>Full lyrics to the song Terrance and Phillip sing, as used on the closing credits

Kyle: But we promised the Earth Day people you'd perform!
Terrance: Well in that case, I'd say you four boys are up fart-creek without a paddle.

We snuck into that woman's spandex to get in here.

Stan

Jesus tap-dancing Christ, is this thing ever gonna end!?!

</i> Stan

Fat Lady: Hi Terrance! I'm such a huge fan!
Terrance: You're a huge fan alright!

Dorky kid in line: Are you guys official presidents too?
Cartman: Don't talk to us kid.

Aw dude! Gay!

</i> Cartman

(When Cartman jumps out of the fat lady's pants)
Cartman: Man, it smells down there!
Terrance: Jesus Christ, that was fast! Well what should we name it? How about Jerry?
(Stan, Kyle, and Kenny jump out of her pants as well)
Fat lady: What the hell!?!
Terrance: Oh wow! We had quadruplets!

Oh boy Kyle, you just made a huge withdraw at the First Bank of Lies.

Cartman
Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 27 in total

South Park Season 5 Episode 5 Quotes


Beef and lamb, chicken and ham,
Step to the left and clap your hands.
Gosh we love that chicken and ham.
Don't let it go to waste, chicken and ham.
clapping sound
Beef and lamb, chicken and ham,
Step to the left and clap your hands.
Got a little left, chicken and ham.
Don't let it go to waste, chicken and ham.
Beef and lamb, chicken and ham,
Step to the left and clap your hands.
Gosh we love that chicken and ham.
Don't let it go to waste, chicken and ham.

<i>Full lyrics to the song Terrance and Phillip sing, as used on the closing credits

(The birth of Terrance and Phillip's famous act)
Narrator: At the tender age of six, Terrance and Phillip were off to the United States to perform on the Ed Sullivan Show, where American audiences would be exposed to Canadians for the first time.
Ed Sullivan: And now, ladies and gentlemen, we have two adorable little boys from Canada. Please put your hands together for the music of young Terrance and Phillip.
Terrance and Phillip: Beef and lamb, chicken and ham, step to the left and clap your hands. Gosh we love that chicken and ham. Don't let it go to waste, chicken and ham.
(Clapping sound)
Woman in audience: Oh my God! What's wrong with their heads?!
Man in audience: It's alright, darling. They're just Canadian.
Woman in audience: Oh.
Terrance and Phillip: Beef and lamb, chicken and ham, step to the left and clap your hands. Got a little left, chicken and ham. Don't let it go to waste, chicken and ham.
(The audience barely applauds)
Narrator: The Canadian act confused American audiences. But then something happened that would change Terrance and Phillip's act forever.
(Phillip farts, which causes Ed and the audience to laugh and applaud loudly.)
(Terrance also farts, which causes the audience to laugh even louder.)
Narrator: It was the birth of Canadian comedy.