Celebrity's a bitch.

Narrator

Hey Boot, how did your parents punish you? Did your Daddy pick the marshmallows out of your hot chocolate or did he just get really disappointed?

Dewey

Officer: Does anyone really care that Mel Gibson's compound burns down?
Ben: Not me.
Officer: Guy probably has three other houses where he can beat up his girlfriend.

Kid: I didn't know cops talked like that to kids.
John: What are you gonna do? Arrest me?

They left two things behind, me and the trash.

Kid

John: Can't put a price tag on man's best friend.
Ben: Sure you can.

Southland cops know when the Santa Ana winds blow, you learn just how close you are to the edge.

Narrator

Spider: What, do you run ironman?
Sammy: No Spider. This is what happens when little gangster shitheads smoke cigarettes.

You know, Superboot. He may lose control of his prisoner, but there's never a hair out of place.

John
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