Raj: You two are as afraid of hurting someone's feelings as I am.
Bernadette: That's not true. We were just laughing right in your face.

Sheldon: Amy's mad at me, and I'm not clear why.
Penny: Okay were you talking before you she got upset?
Sheldon: Yes.
Penny: That's probably it.

Starting to watch a television show that might run for years isn't a decision to take lightly. I'm wrestling with a big commitment issue here.

Sheldon

Amy: Can you believe it's been five years since our first date?
Sheldon: I know. Do you think I should start watching The Flash TV Show?
Amy: That's what you're thinking about?

Bernadette: I don't when I became the mother to three lazy teenagers, but it stops today. You guys are cleaning the kitchen top to bottom.
Raj: Hey, I don't even live here!
Bernadette: Yes or no, do you have clothes in my laundry right now?

Hey, look at that! You both believe in Jewish bearded guys!

Penny

My mother's been there for every award I’ve won since I beat out my twin sister for the did it on the potty trophy.

Sheldon

No need to. As soon as she flies into California air space, I'll feel a disturbance in the force.

Leonard

Sheldon: Won't that void the warranty?
Howard: Sheldon, I have a masters degree in engineering. I wipe my bottom with warranties. Except for Apple Care. That pays for itself in the long run.

All I see is a black screen. And my own reflection. I look sad.

Sheldon

Penny: Think we'll have time to visit your mom while we're there?
Leonard: Yes. We'll also have time to put my junk in a garlic press, but I'm not doing that either.

Sheldon: Aren't you afraid of being blinded?
Leonard: How would I be blinded?
Sheldon: At the end of the ceremony, all the students throw those pointy hats in the air. It's all pomp and circumstance until someone loses an eye.

TBBT Quotes

Penny, there's only one cookie with something in the middle that solves life's problems, and that's an Oreo. Or a Nutter Butter, if you're in a pinch.

Sheldon

Penny: Hey, Sheldon, did you change your Wi-Fi password again?
Sheldon: Yes, it's "Penny, get your own Wi-Fi." No spaces.