The Mentalist Quotes
Bosco: There's no rule bending in the CBI. You two guys are good agents, but Jane has corrupted you.
Rigsby: No, he hasn't.
Bosco: So you were ready to bend the rules before he got here?
Escort Deputy: The arresting officer advises protective custody.
Deputy Bulger: Are you a cop or a child rapist?
Jane: Neither.
Deputy Bulger: What do you need protective custody for, then?
Jane: Well, I guess I don't.
Deputy Bulger: Your funeral.
Lisbon: How did it go with Bosco?
Jane: Good. It was, uh, it was very good. We had a frank exchange of views.
Lisbon: So he's gonna keep us in the loop?
Jane: No.
Lisbon: No?
Jane: Wouldn't direct me to the bathroom if my ass was on fire.
Jane: Can I please continue working with you?
Lisbon: I thought you were quitting.
Jane: You know I didn't mean that.
Lisbon: So the job is worth wile, is it?
Jane: Uh, it's not that. I mean, it' not that at all. It's just... I have nothing else to do.
Lisbon: No jokes. From now, there have to be boundaries.
Jane: Agreed.
Lisbon: I need to know that you can do your work and be effective without creating a mess that I have to clean up.
Jane: No mess, I swear.
Lisbon: On that basis, you can remain with the unit.
Jane: Thank you.
You're not a detective, you're a victim.
Bosco
Cho: Nice. I could arrest you for that.
Jane: You'll never take me alive, copper.
Cho: Seriously.
Jane: Seriously, it's Marilyn and Charlie. What, do you want to make a comedy arrest, see your name written in the weird news section?
Dr. Daniel, no offense, but I've been working with Patrick Jane for nine months now. You wanna get under my skin, you're gonna have to up your game.
Van Pelt
Cho: How is he?
Lisbon: Guess what, he's a bad patient.
Cho: Who would've thought.
Jane: I'm not a bad patient. She's a bad visitor.
Jane: Oh, please don't look at each other like that.
Lisbon: Like what? You can't see.
Jane: I can feel. I can feel your pity.
Jane: Grace, personal question. Rigsby and I were wondering, uh...who is this man you were kissing by the coffee cart?
Van Pelt: That's...that's none of your business.
Jane: Not from payroll?
Van Pelt: Payroll? No, he doesn't even work here. It's none of your business.
Jane: Well, thank heavens for that, at least. No killing needed.
Rigsby: Don't be so sure.
Jane: You'll see. Honesty's best.
Rigsby: Yeah, honestly, I'd like to kick your butt right now.
Rigsby: Jane, I need to ask you a favor. I need you to, uh...I need you to find out from Van Pelt about this guy she's dating. You know, what's the score?
Jane: The score?
Rigsby: Is it serious? Are they, uh, you know?
Jane: Ask her yourself.
Rigsby: Yeah, right. No. Come on. You know the situation. It's against the rules, relationships between coworkers.
Jane: What are you, a man or a mouse?
Rigsby: A man, obviously.
Jane: Could've fooled me.
Rigsby: If it's that guy from payroll, I will kill him.
Jane: Well, that would be a strong, romantic statement. Women like a man that would kill for them. Hey, Van Pelt!
Rigsby: Don't!
Cho: You didn't steal jewelery from her?
Natalie: Please. She dresses like a Mormon call girl. I wouldn't wear her jewelery if you paid me.
