Mindy: You know what they call me around here? They call me Sarge.
Tamra: Actually that didn't stick. We still call you Meatball. [to intern] Yeah, listen to Meatball.

No, I won't do it. When I got my caligraphic's license, I sweared I would only use it for good.

Jeremy

Hey, did this treadmill just ask for my weight? Rude.

She wants me to propose by Christmas. That's not right. It's too much pressure on the Lord's birthday.

Danny

But remember, the bathroom door can't block God's eyes.

Annette

If finding a husband was that easy, I would not be here working. I would be married and in Connecticut. Wine drunk all day and working on my smug mom blog called "Diapers and Daydreams."

We don't even know who this Ladroe guy is. He could be a killer. They never caught Zodiac.

Danny

Mindy: Kate Upton is a perfect 10.
Danny: Who's this Kate Uptown?

Normally, the amount of months I date someone, that's how many years it takes to get over them. So, 7 years.

Morgan

The trick to online dating is you want a bold face lie.

Peter

I can't break up with [Annette]. Danny can not have another father walk out on him.

Morgan

I have never said this in the history of my life, but I think we should skip dinner.

The Mindy Project Quotes

After four vodka sodas I realized, I had something to say.

Mindy

Daniel Castellano, I'm the man that is going to take a person out of you. I don't take that responsibility lightly okay?

Daniel