I know that I'm an adult, but maybe I could come by some time for a teeth-cleaning.


Kevin: I've done better than Erin! Lynn was hotter than Erin... Michael, you dated Holly and Jan and they were so much hotter than you.
Michael: That is debatable. And I have a personality.

This is not babu dabu. In this country, a woman can make the choice as to who she wants to date.


Erin: I don't want anyone to die.
Michael: Just don't let Kevin sit on you.

Kevin has an enormous heart. Literally. He has an elephant heart. He had a transplant when he was 17.


Michael: I would like you to meet your new boyfriend.
Kevin: Yes!
Erin: I don't know what to say.

Pam's mom [to Pam]: Love you.
Michael [to Pam's mom]: Love you, too... as a friend.

Pam: Wanna count her fingers and toes again?
Jim: No. Let her rest. I'm sure there are still 12 of each.

Phyllis: I have an ice cream cake in the car.
Michael: Go! Go! Go! Are you insane?

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