Didn't you get the memo? It's stairmageddon.


They kiss. It is super emotional, like in Toy Story.

Ryan Howard

Oscar: It looks like the camera man was hiding behind the shelves.
Phyllis: Wait, so they were filming all the time even when we didn't know it?

Angela: I bet she'll eat them right out of your hand with those big strong teeth.
Dwight: Did I tell you about her teeth?

This is a documentary? Ohhhh. I always thought we were like specimens in a human zoo.


I go to the bathroom for 45 minutes and everything changes.


Dwight: Long term tractor releases can put pressure on a relationship.
Clark: Yeah, a lot of my buddies are going through the same thing right now.

Nostalgia is truly one of the great human weaknesses...second only to the neck.


People underestimate the power of nostalgia. If baseball can use it to get people to care about that worthless sport, then I can use it to get my siblings to care about the farm.


He used to talk about planting a peanut/grape hybrid...one plant, one sandwich.


Packer: Sorry for calling you a fat little runt earlier.
Clark: You didn't actually say that.
Packer: No? Wow. I'm in this mode now where I'm apologizing for thoughts that are in my head.

You were the aunt to my cousins. Most of your life you were 5'4". At the end you were 5'1".


The Office Quotes

Guess what, I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don't know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me... No, don't sue me. That is the opposite of the point that I'm trying to make.


Sometimes I'll start a sentence, and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way. Like an improv conversation. An improversation.