The Office

The Office Season 2 Quotes (Page 5)

Season 2 Episode 16: "Valentine's Day"

Michael: New York, New York. The city so nice, they named it twice. Manhattan is the other name.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Dwight: What's this on my desk?
Jim: It's a box.
Dwight: But who left it here... and to what purpose?
 • Rating: Unrated

Dwight: Women are like wolves. If you want a wolf, you have to trap it. Snare it. Then to keep it happy, you have to tame it. Feed it, care for it. Lovingly. The way an animal deserves to be loved. And my animal deserves a lot of loving.
 • Rating: 4.7 / 5.0

Jan: Surely you aren't serious about this, Michael.
Michael: Of course I'm serious. And don't call me Shirley.
 • Rating: 1.0 / 5.0

Pam: Sometimes the gift is really about the gesture, you know, like, what it means, instead of what it is.
Dwight: You mean ... like a ham?
Pam: No. Not like a ham.
 • Rating: 2.0 / 5.0

Season 2 Episode 15: "Boys & Girls"

Jan: Dress for the job you want, not the job you have
[interview]
Angela: Judging from her attire, Jan aspires to be a whore.
 • Rating: Unrated

Jim: You gotta take a chance on something sometime, Pam.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Michael: Rich people like pizza, poor people like pizza. White people like pizza, black people like pizza.... do black people like pizza?
 • Rating: Unrated

Michael: Now you may look around and see two groups here: white-collar and blue-collar. But I don't see it that way, and you know why not? Because I am collar blind.
 • Rating: Unrated

Michael: Everyone, guys. Circle up, please. Come on over. Bring your chairs. Toby, come on over. You're a guy... too. Sort of.
 • Rating: Unrated

Roy: I'm glad she has a friend at work that she can get through the day with. That way she's not all, "blah blah blah" when she gets home.
Jim: Yeah, I like talking to her too.
 • Rating: Unrated

Kevin: I bet Roy heard about you liking Pam. I bet he'll try to beat you up.
Jim: Thanks for the heads up, Kev.
Kevin: I got your back if he does. [pauses] But try to stay out of it.
 • Rating: Unrated

Michael: Let's start with the warehouse. What bothers you as guys? You know?
Darryl: My priority is safety.
Michael: Ok.
Darryl: So it really bothers me when somebody comes in here speeding around on a lift, playing with it like a toy. It kind of gets under my skin, ok?
Michael: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
 • Rating: Unrated

Michael: This is Darryl, one of our warehouse staff. Darryl, what is your biggest fear?
Darryl: My biggest fear is that someone will distract us from getting all the shipments out on time.
 • Rating: Unrated

Michael: These guys are down there. They are real men doing real man's work. We are going to learn how a warehouse works. Oh, I think this is gonna work out great because managing the warehouse is a very important part of my job, and I haven't been there in months.
 • Rating: Unrated

Jan: I don't know what you're doing here, Michael, but it's very disruptive.
Michael: Just having a little "Guys in the Workplace" thing. [to the men] Why can't boys play with dolls? Why does society force us to use urinals, when sitting down is far more comfortable?
Jan: Can you please do this somewhere else, Michael?
 • Rating: Unrated

Dwight: It's a terrible idea.
Jim: What is?
Dwight: Them in there all together. They stay in there too long, they're gonna get on the same cycle. Wreak havoc on our plumbing.
 • Rating: Unrated

Michael: "Women in the Workplace." Yeah. Translation: I have been banned from my own conference room so that Jan can talk in secret to all the girls - oh, sorry "women of the workplace." About what? I don't know. Clothes. Me.
 • Rating: Unrated

Michael: I just have a few things I want to say.
Jan: What are you doing?
Michael: Just hear me out. What is more important than quality? Equality. Now, studies show that today's woman, the "Ally McBeal woman" as I call her, is at a crossroads.
Jan: Michael...
Michael: No, just - you have come a long way, baby! But I just wanna keep it within reason. They did this up in Albany, and they ended up turning the break room into a lactation room, which is disgusting.
Jan: Now you're really not allowed in this session.
Michael: Well, I'm their boss.
Jan: I'm your boss.
 • Rating: Unrated

Pam: Today's a "Women in the Workplace" thing. Jan's coming in from corporate to talk to all the women about, um, I don't know what. But Michael's not allowed. She said that about five times.
 • Rating: Unrated

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