The Office Season 2 Quotes
Dwight: OK. I'm going to have to search your car. Give me your keys.
Ryan: I am not giving you my keys.
Dwight: Don't make me do this the hard way.
Ryan: What's the hard way?
Dwight: I go down to the police station, on my lunch break. I tell a police officer (I know several) what I suspect you may have in your car. He requests a hearing from a judge and obtains a search warrant. Once he has said warrant, he will drive over here and make you give him the keys to your car, and you will have to obey him.
Ryan: Yeah, let's do it that way.
- Permalink: OK. I'm going to have to search your car. Give me your keys. I...
Oscar: So, Pam told me you do a great Stanley impression. I'd love to hear it.
Jim: Oh, um. "Why do you keep CCing me on things that have nothing to do with me?"
Stanley: Is that supposed to be me?
Jim: Oh, hey, Stanley. Uh, I was just doing an impression.
Stanley: I do not think that is funny.
Pam: He does everyone in the office.
Stanley: Hmph. [leaves]
Jim and Pam: "I do not think that is funny."
- Permalink: So, Pam told me you do a great Stanley impression. I'd love to h...
Dwight: It is 11:23 exactly, the exact moment you emerged from your mother's vaginal canal.
- Permalink: 23 exactly, the exact moment you emerged from your mother's vagi...
Toby: Didn't you lose a lot of money on that other investment, the one from that e-mail?
Michael: You know what, Toby? When the son of the deposed King of Nigeria e-mails you directly asking for help, you help. His father ran the freaking country, okay?
- Permalink: Didn't you lose a lot of money on that other investment, the one...
Kevin: It's negative!
Michael: God... we're gonna beat this, OK? C'mere...
[later, in interview]
Michael: Well apparently in the medicine community, negative means 'good.' Which makes absolutely no sense. In the real world community that would be chaos.
- Permalink: It's negative! God... we're gonna beat this, OK? C'mere... ...
I never really thought about death until Princess Diana died. That was the saddest funeral ever. That and my sister's.Kelly
- Permalink: I never really thought about death until Princess Diana died. Th...
Hey Pam? All that stuff with Kevin... pretty scary. I'm thinking that, uh, next time you're in the shower, you should check yourself out, you know, give yourself an exam. Those things are like ticking timebags.Michael
- Permalink: Hey Pam? All that stuff with Kevin... pretty scary. I'm thinking...
Michael: You know what the best medicine is?
Kevin: The doctor said a combination of Interferon and Dacarbazine.
Michael: And laughter.
- Permalink: You know what the best medicine is? The doctor said a combinat...
Pam: We got Kevin 69 Cup-of-Noodles.
Jim: Which we realize sounds crass, but it is his favorite number.
Pam: And his favorite lunch.
- Permalink: We got Kevin 69 Cup-of-Noodles. Which we realize sounds crass,...