I'll have you know I'm also a hair donor. Salma Hayek wore me to the Oscars.

Otto

• Permalink: I'll have you know I'm also a hair donor. Salma Hayek wore me to...
• Added: February 19, 2012

Homer (on Maggie): Let her slice off the tip of your ear and she'll go right to sleep.
Carl: No
Homer: That's not a choice you get to make.

• Permalink: Let her slice off the tip of your ear and she'll go right to sle...
• Added: February 19, 2012

Oh, I always thought tarred and feathered was just a figure of speech. Good luck patching pot holes and stuffing pillows now!

Homer

• Permalink: Oh, I always thought tarred and feathered was just a figure of s...
• Added: February 19, 2012

Lisa: I pick up books like you pick up beers.
Homer: Then you have a serious reading problem.

• Permalink: I pick up books like you pick up beers. Then you have a seriou...
• Added: February 19, 2012

Homer: Sorry, Dad. I was afraid the dragon wouldn't cough the moon back up.
Grampa: You idiot! Dragon always coughs the moon back up.

• Permalink: Sorry, Dad. I was afraid the dragon wouldn't cough the moon back...
• Added: February 19, 2012