The Simpsons Season 5 Episode 16: "Homer Loves Flanders" Quotes
Football Fan: Give me, er, 30,000 tickets.
Ticket Lady: That'll be $950,000 please.
Football Fan: Look, the thing about that is, I only got $10 on me. Can I pay you the rest later?
Ticket Lady: Sure.
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Bart: Hey Dad, sell you these for fifty bucks
Homer: Woo hoo! Sold. (Bart takes the money and runs off)
Marge: Those aren't tickets to the game, Homer.
Homer: What do you mean? It says right here: "Free wig with every purchase of large wig. Downtown Wig Center". Why you little
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(recieves a football) Wow! Thanks. Now I have four children You will be called "stitch face."
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Just miles from your doorstep, hundreds of men are given weapons and trained to kill. The government calls it the Army, but a more alarmist name would be... The Killbot Factory.Kent Brockman
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Let's sacrifice him to our god! Come on, we did it all the time in the thirties.Grampa
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I'd like to propose a toast to the coming together of the Simpsons and the Flanders. If this were a more perfect world, we'd all be known as the Flimpsons.
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Lisa: Don't worry, Bart. It seems like every week something odd happens to the Simpsons. My advice is to ride it out, make the occasional smart-alec quip, and by next week we'll be back to where we started from, ready for another wacky adventure.
Bart: Ay, caramba!
Lisa: That's the spirit.
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They don't call me "Springfield Fats" just because I'm morbidly obese!
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Ned: Oh, I guess it's time for me to duck again.
Homer: No! I want everyone to know that-- (yelling out window) --this is Ned Flanders, my friend!
Lenny: What'd he say?
Carl: I dunno. Something about being gay.
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