The Simpsons

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Hey, Mel. Bring me another nicotine patch. I think there's some space on my butt.

Krusty

Secretary: Is this the Abraham Simpson who wrote the Itchy and Scratchy episode?
Grampa: Ishy and what? No, you must be some kind of crazy person.
Secretary: I'm sorry, but we have a substantial check here for a Mr. Abraham Simpson.
Grampa: That's right. I did the Iggy.

Homer: I never passed Remedial Science 1A.
Marge: And you're a nuclear technician?
Homer: Marge! Ix-nay on the uclear-nay echnician-tay. (Speaking in Pig Latin)
Marge: What did you say?
Homer: I dunno. I flunked Latin, too.

Well, whenever I'm confused, I just check my underwear. It holds the answer to all the important questions.

Grampa

Song: Hens Love Roosters
Geese Love Ganders
Everyone else loves Ned Flanders
Homer: Not me!
Everyone who counts loves Ned Flanders!
Ned: Knock that off you two it's time for church!
Rod: We're not going to church today!
Ned: What? You give me one good reason!
Todd: It's Saturday.
Ned: Oakily doakily-doo!
Song: Hens Love Roosters
Geese Love Ganders
Everyone else loves Ned Flanders

Dondelinger: Alright, here are your exams, fifty questions true or false.
Homer: True.
Dondelinger: Homer, I was just describing the test.
Homer: True.
Dondelinger: Look Homer, just take the test and you'll do fine.
Homer: False.

Dondelinger: Now, I'm going to burn this donut to show you how many calories it has.
Homer: NOOOOOOOOOOO!
Dondelinger: The bright blue flame indicates this was a particularly sweet donut.
Homer: This is not happening!

Roger Meyers, Jr.: Hey, how would you kids like a tour of the studio? Abe, are you coming?
Grampa: Any stairs?
Roger Meyers, Jr.: Just one.
Grampa: Nuts to you.

They fought, and bit, they fought and fought and bit, fought fought fought, bit bit bit, it was the Itchy & Scratchy show.

Itchy & Scratchy Ending Theme

-DELETED SCENE-
Homer: Marge, I can't live with this shame anymore. I don't care what it takes. I'm going to overcome this. It'll be like that movie, you know, where that woman skiier fell off the mountain. I think it was called don't fall of the mountain.
Marge: What's your point?
Homer: I am going to ski! I mean graduate from high school.

Lisa: Grampa, how did you take off your underwear without taking off your pants?
Grampa: I don't know!

Lisa's Brain: Poor predictable Bart. Always takes 'rock'.
Bart's Brain: Good ol' 'rock'. Nuthin' beats that!
Bart: Rock!
Lisa: Paper.
Bart: D'oh!

Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 19 in total

The Simpsons Season 4 Episode 19 Quotes

Secretary: Is this the Abraham Simpson who wrote the Itchy and Scratchy episode?
Grampa: Ishy and what? No, you must be some kind of crazy person.
Secretary: I'm sorry, but we have a substantial check here for a Mr. Abraham Simpson.
Grampa: That's right. I did the Iggy.

Hey, Mel. Bring me another nicotine patch. I think there's some space on my butt.

Krusty