The Simpsons
Sundays 8:00 PM on FOXThe Simpsons Season 24 Quotes
Homer: Marge, this is it. TEOTWAWKI.
Marge: The end of the world as we know it?!?
I guess despite all our so-called civilization, anarchy lurks around every corner like a racially diverse street gang on a network cop show.
Homer
Bart: Dad, what would you do if you got my ear in the mail?
Homer: I don't know; feed it to the dog.
Bart: You'd have to wrap cheese around it.
Homer: Don't you tell me how to feed you to the dog!
I insist you never wear shoes or a proper necktie again. Just house slippers and the most humiliating tie there is - bolo.
Burns
God closes a door, he opens a gunshop.
Herman
Well, that's just how dogs are. The most disloyal, unfaithful creatures god ever made.
Homer
Grampa: Unfortunately, like all true stories, this one has a crappy ending.
Bart: You have a story with an ending.
Bart: He's alive!
Marge: And he didn't pee on the floor.
Grampa: For me that's a perfect day.
I love that dog...but that is one long, stupid name.
Lisa
That's right, your lord sticks his hand in his pants. And yes, it is the same hand I tapped you with.
Homer
T-Rex: T.V.? We don't own a t.v.
Lisa: I didn't know that was an option.
No one judges my wife's thunder bags.
Homer
