Come back, I'm a clown. I can't afford to look ridiculous.


Homer: Marge, did you replace our regular mirror with a magical mirror from a mystical salesman at a weird store that if we went back to find it it wouldn't be there anymore?
Marge: No
Homer: AAAAHHH!!

Homer: Marge, who would give up eating steak in the matrix to go slurp goo in Zion?
Marge: We don't have that movie here.

Oh, they're so cute when they're Duplo.

Homer (on Maggie)

It's not selling out. It's co-branding. Co-branding!


Oh, why are you doing this to me booze, I drank every kind of you.


Lenny: Why do they call this a yard of ale?
Carl: Easy, after you drink it, you're passed out in a yard.

Do you know how embarrassed I was to get a call at my arraignment for my behavior during the pub crawl because of a voodoo curse my son placed on his art teacher?


A minute of fun a lifetime of work. I've never heard of a pregnancy like this.


Wow, now I see why they call you Miss Hoover. You must have been vacuuming for an hour.


You used up all your clones you fat, fat, fat reckless, fat pig.


Marge:You can live with your no good son.
Bart: Hey, what did I do?
Marge: Nothing for thirty years. You're perfect for each other.

The Simpsons Season 25 Quotes

I'm not sure man who eats right and doesn't drink can be good in bed.


Oh, I've been listening to this song for three days, and it's only the end of the first verse.